“I understand,” he murmured. Not looking at her. “But…this is your room now. I will stay in the other room.”
He climbed off the bed and walked over to the chest of drawers. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I never should have presumed I could stay in here with you. I was just so upset that your father dared to beat you when you were under my protection. I wanted to wrap you up tight and never let you go. To protect you from him. But I realize now how stifling that must have felt.”
She turned towards him then, but he wasn’t even facing her. Her heart sank. She hadn’t felt stifled. She’d felt loved.
But she was a little terrified of his kind of love now. If he didn’t balk at sliding a sword into his brother to save him, what would he be willing to do to her if he felt like she was threatened again?
Quietly, he gathered his belongings before disappearing out into the hallway. He didn’t even use the shared door to enter his new room. Nor did he speak to her again. He closed her door firmly and headed for his room.
Wondering what on earth he was supposed to do now.
––
She wandered back to her bed and fell onto it to lie alone as she had before he’d joined her. She missed his comfort terribly…already.
––
He shouldn’t have told her. But what else could he have done? She’d already believed the worst of him. How could the truth possibly make things worse? But somehow it had.
He remembered with bitterness her sweet kisses, and his heart took a nosedive. Would he never feel the brush of those honeyed lips against his own again? Was he to be forever locked out from her life now? Would they go their separate ways once again? He to the king’s side, and she to…where? What did she have but him now?
Perhaps he should bend all his powers of concentration on that task. Finding her something worthwhile for which to live.
He wondered what interested her. Or how she’d occupied herself before she’d married him. He would have to investigate. This was the only gift that he had left to give her.
Suddenly, he knew exactly what to do.
––
Jung Sook glanced up at Lady Bit Na in surprise. “What? Seok Dan Se is here? Requesting to see me?”
Her mother-in-law nodded. “Yes. Please hurry. He looks quite distressed.”
“Is it about Mi Sook? Was she hurt even more badly than I thought?” Her heart ascending into her mouth, Jung Sook jumped up from her chair.
Lady Bit Na frowned. “I do not know, my dear. He simply requested to speak with you.”
Jung Sook hurried out to the sitting room.
“Seok Dan Se, is Mi Sook all right?” she quizzed him as fear continued to spiral through her.
His expression melted at her concern. “Yes. First of all, I have to thank you, Kim Jung Sook, for alerting me to my wife’s condition.” He bowed to her. More than once. “Second, I have come to ask for your further assistance.”
Her brow cleared as relief flooded her soul. “She is truly all right?”
“She is damaged beyond belief. But she will not die. And I think that fear is what was distressing you, was it not?”
She nodded at the perceptive man. “But…what has damaged her?” she asked. Ignoring the obvious.
“Beyond her father’s fists, I have damaged her. Damaged her faith in me, that is. We are now…estranged, I believe.” He wandered over to the window and stood staring up at the sky.
“What?” she asked, distressed again. She knew for a fact that Dan Se was a good man who had been put into a horrible situation. She and Soo Ho had discussed the circumstances surrounding Han Sung’s death at length. “What do you mean? How can you be estranged? Did you not go to her after I sent my note?”
“I did. She was asleep. So I went and dealt with her father. And got permission from the king to spend the next month taking care of her. But I fear that she does not wish to see me anymore. That is where you come in. Or so I hope.” He turned towards her. His face impassive now.
She studied that carefully guarded countenance and instantly perceived that this man was often misunderstood. “Why does she not wish to see you?”
He swallowed and looked away from her. “I told her the truth about my brother’s death. It was more than she could stomach.”
She frowned. Mi Sook hadn’t seemed such a squeamish girl. “What truth?”
“That I was trying to save Han Sung,” he admitted grudgingly.
“And when you told her this?” she prodded him.
“She turned away from me. And asked to have her own bedchamber.”
Puzzled, Jung Sook studied him. “That makes no sense. What other details of that day did you share with her?”
He tried to remember. “I’m not really sure. I…” His mind traveled back to that conversation. She had said something to him, and he had refuted it. But…what had it been?
He shook his head. “I don’t recall.”
“What?” she queried in disbelief. “It does not seem to me that you have discussed much of that day with her.”
“I told you. She would not hear anymore. She clearly wished to be rid of me. So I left.”
She shook her head. Did this man know so little of women that he would leave his wife hanging like this? She studied his solemn face for a moment. And considered his circumstances. And realized that, of course, he knew little of women. He was from a household of all men. In a class of the king’s elite soldiers. Again, surrounded completely by only men.
She sighed. “You need to speak with your wife and clear the air.”
“She does not wish to see me.”
She rolled her eyes. He was sounding nearly as petulant as the adolescent girls whom she taught each day. “Seok Dan Se, answer me this. Do you care for Mi Sook?”
Jung Sook already knew that he did. It was plain in the way that he’d rushed to his wife’s side after receiving her note earlier today. His adoration of the woman had also been clearly written in his gaze when he’d first spoken of her. Plus, he was seeking her aid to help Mi Sook.
He met her gaze then and nodded.
“I do not know a woman on this earth who wouldn’t wish for her husband to love her,” she responded quietly.
He shrugged. “I cannot answer that. I know only that she doesn’t wish to speak to me any longer. That is why I have come to you for help.”
“And just what do you wish for me to do?”
“To discover her passion.”
Confused, she frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I know not how to make her happy. I think that I do not possess the power to make her happy. But there must be something that would make her happy. Some activity or pursuit that would fulfill her. I need your help to discover it so that I can make it available to her. That way when I return to the hwarang, I can leave behind a woman content with her own life.”
Her heart bent as she studied his sad countenance. “I doubt very much that she will be happy when you leave her alone.”
“You are mistaken. She does not need me.”
Mystified, she gaped at him. “How can you not see it?” she breathed.
Confused, he glanced her way. “See what?”
“Seok Dan Se, I suspect that you are the one and only man to ever defend Mi Sook. How on earth could she wish to be parted from you?”
He shrugged. “She has apparently made a very accurate assessment of my character and found me lacking. I believe that she is afraid of me,” he admitted mournfully.
“Then make her unafraid of you!”
“I do not have that power.” He turned away from her again. “Does this mean that you will not help me?” he questioned in disappointment.
“I did not say that.” Exasperated, she stared at the clueless gentleman. “Have you tried to speak to her? To clear the air?”
He shook his head. “I left her alone. Per her request.”
It pained him still. He had been distracting her from the pain with his story. What was left to distract her now?
Jung Sook drew a deep breath. This couple clearly needed her help. She wasn’t quite sure what lie Mi Sook was believing about Dan Se, but something was certainly amiss. There was nothing in the truth to terrify her. Only to make her pity him.
“I will help you. You wish me to befriend her? And to discover what she loves?”
He turned hopefully towards her. “Yes. And then report to me so that I can assist her in making her dreams come true.” His lips flipped upwards in an attempt at a smile. “Thank you, Kim Jung Sook,” he bowed to her again.
As he straightened, he queried, “Can you visit her today?” Another spasm crossed his face. “She’s in a great deal of pain. I was attempting to distract her by telling her a story, but then she turned away from me.”
Jung Sook could hear the distress in his voice.
“I’m afraid she’s going to lie in that room alone for the next few weeks. Suffering. And here I am, without any work to do. I should be with her. Solacing her.”
“Yes, you should,” she replied ruthlessly. “Return to her. Make her listen to the truth, Dan Se.”
“Not yet. My only concern is to see her happy. She would much rather see you right now than me. Please come home with me. Comfort her in any way you can.”
Her heart sank as she read the determination in his gaze. What would he do if she refused him?
Most likely, he would return home and sit alone in a room. Stewing over his wife. Who would also be alone. In her room. Stewing over her husband.
Jung Sook nodded briskly. “I will come with you. It’s a good thing I had no classes today.”
He glanced up at her then curiously. “Oh, yes,” he crumpled his brow. “What led you to my house today?”
“I’ve been wanting to call on your wife since your wedding. I…recognized in her…a kindred spirit.”
He stared at her in consternation, perplexed by her statement. “What do you mean? In what way did you recognize her as a kindred spirit?”
Jung Sook sniffed as she drew herself up to her full height. “I recognized the signs of abuse.”
“What?” he asked in astonishment.
“She did not sit down throughout that long day. Not once. And she insisted on dressing for the wedding alone. Only after she had her first set of robes on did she allow us to assist her. She was covering up her bruises, wasn’t she?”
So he hadn’t been the only one to notice.
“Her father beat her sometime before your wedding, didn’t he? Within the few days before?”
He nodded.
She sighed. “I thought so. Poor mite,” she moaned.
“But,” he quizzed her as he narrowed his eyes, “how did you know?”
Her lips twisted. “Because my father also believed in making his daughter his punching bag.” She turned towards the door. “Let me grab a few belongings. Then I shall return to your house with you.”
She slipped through the doorway before he could utter another word. But he stared after her and wondered how many women in this city had been abused by some man or another. As he had been abused by his own grandfather.
It is astonishing how many people suffer abuse from people who are supposed to take care of them and love them.