The Kinsman – Chapter 27: Convinced

She lay for several long minutes, her eyes closed, recalling the tender touch of his fingertips on her bruised skin in the middle of the night.  She dredged up every beautiful memory that she could.  And found herself yearning for that sweet touch again.

She indulged in a good cry while she lay alone in that bed.  Something which she had seldom done.  But Dan Se had begun to thaw her frozen heart.  And she couldn’t seem to find the numbness anymore.  Her entire heart felt simply…raw.

She was so tempted to go crawl into his bed with him this morning.  What would he do if he found her there when he awoke?

Likely, he would ignore her and leave the room, returning to this one to dress for the day.

Her heart was broken.

She had married a good man.  And briefly – crazily – believed that she’d been tied to a monster instead.  How could she ever admit the truth to him? 

If he knew why she’d fled from him, he would most likely – fairly – think her insane.  To believe such a horrible thing – yet again – about him.

As she lay despairing, a knock sounded on her outer door.

“Who is it?” she called.

“Jung Sook,” came her friend’s sweet voice.

Instantly, Mi Sook’s heart lifted.  “Come in!” she exclaimed in excitement.

At least, she had one friend.  Jung Sook hadn’t left her alone.

She watched as her door opened, and Soo Ho’s wife appeared.  Smiling.  But the instant that she saw the tearstains bleeding down her friend’s face, her brow crumpled, and she flew across the room.  Flinging the door back into its place as she moved forward.

“My dear!  What ever is wrong?”  Jung Sook came to perch on the edge of the forlorn girl’s bed.

“I have royally messed things up with Dan Se.  And I have no idea how to fix them!”

“What do you mean?  What happened last night?”

“I did just what you told me to do.  I crawled into his bed last night.”  She frowned.  “Wait a minute.  How did you know that I was in this room?”

“I didn’t.  I knocked on the other door, and Dan Se answered it.  He told me you were in this room.”

“He’s awake?”  How long had she been weeping in her new bed?

“So,” her friend brought her back to her story, “you crawled into his bed last night….”  Jung Sook furrowed her brow.  “But clearly, he was not in it with you this morning since I discovered him in your old room.  So, what happened?”

“I don’t know.  He joined me last night.  I know this because I awoke in pain, and his gentle voice greeted me.  I asked him to put the cream you brought on my back.  And he did.”

Jung Sook watched as her new friend’s cheeks turned rosy and quickly ascertained that the woman was quite smitten with her husband.  “What happened then?”

“I don’t know,” Mi Sook mourned.  “I fell asleep, and when I awoke, he was gone.  I found him sleeping in my old bed this morning.”

Jung Sook quirked a dark eyebrow.  “Did you join him?”

“What?” Mi Sook glanced up at her friend in surprise.  “Of course not!  He clearly didn’t want to sleep with me!”

“Hmm.  I wonder…I don’t think that’s it.  He found you in his bed, realized you were in pain, ministered to your back, and went to sleep in the other room.  I think he was worried that he would hurt you in his sleep.”

“How’s that?” Mi Sook murmured, confused.

“He was worried that he would bump into you.  So he moved to the other room.  So he wouldn’t upset your bruises.”

Mi Sook’s face brightened.  “Do you really think so?”

Jung Sook smiled.  “I do.”  Her face relaxed into an even deeper expression of fondness for her new friend.  “Mi Sook, the man is head over heels in love with you.  He spent several long minutes when he was likely very weary to take care of you last night.  Doesn’t that spell love to you?”

Mi Sook sobered and stared down at the sheet under her.  “I do not know what love looks like,” she murmured.  “At least, not the love of a man.”

“Really, it looks very much like the love of a woman.  Taking care of and protecting the one loved.  And Dan Se has done that in spades, I would say.  Fleeing to your side when he discovered your father had hurt you again.  Then confronting your father to ensure that he’ll never hurt you again.  Leaving the hwarang for a whole month to take care of you…”

Mi Sook gasped and swung her head around to look at the teacher.  “What?  What are you talking about?”

Jung Sook glanced sharply at her friend.  “You do not know?”

“Know what?”

“That the king has given Dan Se a month off.  To be with you.  To care for you.”

“What?”  Mi Sook rolled onto her side.  “The king?  Why?  I don’t understand.”

“Dan Se was so concerned about you that after he visited with your father, he returned to Hwa Gong and told him what had happened.  The hwarang commander headed to see the king.  When Jin Heung learned of the situation, he demanded that Dan Se come see him.  Dan Se discussed his concerns for your health and safety with the king, and he insisted that your husband come take care of you for a month. Giving you time to heal.  And,” Jung Sook grinned at her, “to enjoy your husband, I think.”

Mi Sook could feel her cheeks warming up.  “I had no idea.  Dan Se never said a thing.”

“I rather think that the two of you need to learn how to communicate with each other.”

Mi Sook sighed.

“My dear, I really think that you need to believe some good about your husband.”

“What do you mean?” the older girl wrinkled her brow in consternation.

“Well, for starters, you need to believe the man loves you.  And has the very best intentions for you.  He’s not going to hurt you.”  Jung Sook sighed.  “I know that’s hard to fathom after you grew up with a father like yours.  But if Soo Ho has taught me anything, it’s that men can be good.  And they can love us.  And want to do us good.”

Mi Sook’s face crumpled.  “It’s just so hard to fathom,” she whispered.

“Even after last night?” Jung Sook questioned softly.

Mi Sook nodded.  “When we were growing up, Dan Se was always hard.  Rigid.  Unbending.  Like my father.  He never played with me and Han Sung.  He just stood off to the side.  Watching us.”

“On the outside.  Looking in,” Jung Sook murmured.

Her attention caught by her friend’s quiet voice, Mi Sook glanced sharply at her.  “What?”

“Dan Se has always been on the outside.  Looking in.  He was never the favored son.  Being a true bone, and not a sacred bone, he was taught that he was inferior to his brother.  That his sole purpose in life was to serve Han Sung.”

“Even becoming his whipping boy.”

“Exactly.”  Jung Sook nodded her head definitively.

“Poor Dan Se,” Mi Sook pouted.  “It breaks my heart.”

“Mine too.  And you and I both know what it feels like to be beaten unfairly.  So you should have ample compassion for your husband.  He was a wall when you were a child because it was required of him.  Had he not grown rigid, he would have crumbled apart.”

Mi Sook frowned.

“He was just protecting himself.  He couldn’t afford to grow soft like Han Sung.”

His wife sighed.  “But I think that, somehow, underneath all that, he is soft.”

“I think so too.” Jung Sook reached out to pat her friend’s hand.  “Don’t despair.  I really think that the two of you will figure this out.  Keep trying.  And keep believing that he truly cares for you.  That’s the most important thing.  If you stop believing that, then you’ll be in a world of hurt.”

Mi Sook grimaced.

And Jung Sook changed the subject momentarily.  She was on a mission.  And had been given new orders this morning.  Or, rather, old orders.  A former request which she had yet to fulfill.

“My dear, what interests you?”

“What?” Mi Sook quirked her eyebrow in confusion.

“If you could do anything with your time, how would you spend it?”

Mi Sook frowned.  No one had ever asked her such a question before.  She closed her eyes and recalled how much she had always loved to sketch as a child.  Before she grimaced as she remembered the pain that had exploded in her fingers the day that her father had discovered her wasting her time on such a foolish pursuit. 

“I used to love to draw,” she admitted in a whisper.

Jung Sook’s eyes lit up.  “You did?”

Mi Sook nodded.  “But…I haven’t sketched anything in a long time.”

“Why not?”

When Mi Sook remained silent, her friend filled in the blanks.  “Your father.”

She bobbed her head as she stared down at her bed.

“Is there anything else that you enjoy?”

Mi Sook shrugged.

“Come now.  There must be something.  How have you passed your time since you gave up sketching?”

“I studied a lot.  My father is quite proud of his library.  And he wanted me to know how to read.”  She cringed as she recalled those uncomfortable lessons.  “I hated learning, though.  He was terribly impatient with me.  He insisted on teaching me himself in the beginning.  But finding me to be a terrible student, he finally hired a tutor to teach me.”  Under that woman’s kinder tutelage, she had found herself struggling less and had soon learned to read.

“Do you enjoy reading now?”

She shrugged.  “Not really.  I mostly sat around embroidering.  It was as close as I could get to my true love.”  She glanced up at Jung Sook and grinned.  “Sketching.”

Jung Sook studied her.  “Are you sure that Dan Se isn’t your true love?”  She watched in delight as the girl’s cheeks suddenly bloomed crimson.

Mi Sook cleared her throat and redirected the conversation.  “Is Soo Ho yours?” she queried mischievously, deflecting her friend’s attention away from herself.

“Oh, absolutely!” Jung Sook grinned at her.  “So…what are you going to do today?”

Mi Sook shrugged as she pleated the sheet with her fingers.  “Probably lie in bed and be miserable,” she murmured.  “Everything hurts.”

“Sounds to me like you could use some company,” her friend pointed out.

Mi Sook cocked an eyebrow.  “But I already have some company.  Are you suggesting that you wish to stay with me today?”

“I would love to.  But I have to teach classes this morning.”

“Ah.”  Mi Sook was disappointed.  But she forced a bright smile onto her face.  “Have a lovely day.”

“I intend to.  Though, honestly, I have grown truly weary of the rivalry between my two oldest students.”

“Oh?”

Jung Sook suddenly began to giggle.  “They were once both in love with my husband.  And to this day, they still hate each other.”

Her eyes grew wide in disbelief.  “They were both in love with Soo Ho?”

Jung Sook nodded as she continued to laugh.  “Seems half the town was once in love with Soo Ho.”

“Including you.”

“Oh, no.  I didn’t have any love for him then.  But I am madly in love with him now.  So, I commiserate with their agony.”

It was Mi Sook’s turn to chuckle.  Then she gazed inquiringly at her new friend.  “So…why did you fall in love with Soo Ho?”

“Oh, the man was quite aggravating in the beginning, I can assure you!” Jung Sook ejaculated.  “But very slowly he grew on me.  Like barnacles on the bottom of a boat,” she giggled, startling another chortle out of her friend.

They grinned at each other.

“But he had this adorable habit of rescuing me from dangerous, vicious men.”

Mi Sook quirked a bold eyebrow at her.

“A beggar attacked me on the road in front of the hwarang house one day, and Soo Ho defended me.  After that, he would not allow me to walk to school alone.  So, I guess I got used to his company.  Then he offered to teach me how to swordfight.”

Mi Sook gasped.  “Truly?” she breathed in awe.

Jung Sook bobbed her head.  “Truly!”  She chuckled again.  “We had another falling out, but he came to Bo A’s rescue in the marketplace – truly, the man has a savior complex, I think.”

“Who is Bo A?”

“She’s a girl I took under my wing last year.  Her father was about to strike her in the center of the market, but Soo Ho stopped him.  But you must know how that goes….”  She glanced sharply at the other girl.

“You knew that she would get it twice as bad at home because he intervened.”

“Exactly.  So I offered to give her an apprenticeship.  She’s been with me ever since.  But not without a major bump.”

Furrowing her brow, Mi Sook queried, “What do you mean?”

“Bo A came to live with me, and one night her father showed up drunk on my doorstep.  He decided he was going to rape me, and he held a knife to my chest.”

Mi Sook gasped in alarm.

“But Soo Ho arrived, withdrew his sword from its scabbard, and stopped that man from hurting me.”

Her eyes now wide with incredulity, Mi Sook breathed, “He killed him?”

Jung Sook nodded.  “He did.  Poor Bo A watched Soo Ho run a sword through her father.  She was shaking like a leaf.  So was I.  It was a horrible night.  But it convinced me that Soo Ho truly loved me and wasn’t just toying with my affections like he had with so many girls before me.  I still don’t understand why he would choose a plain girl like me over all those pretty village misses….”

“Plain!  You are not plain!  Not at all!  Jung Sook, you are quite pretty!”

“If I am, it is because Soo Ho’s love has made me so.  I can assure you that I was quite plain before he glanced my way.”

Mi Sook shook her head.  “You are certainly not plain.  And I doubt you ever were.”  She gazed at the beautiful face of her friend.  “How could you be anything less than gorgeous?  You are the first girl who has ever befriended me.  And you are a woman of character.  And kindness.  I’m sure that Soo Ho had a dozen reasons for loving you.”

The corners of Jung Sook’s mouth quirked upward in a tiny smile.  “Thank you for your ready defense of me.  And I remember what it felt like to walk through life friendless.  Those were sad days.  I wish to rescue you from them.”

“Ah…so like your husband, you too suffer from a savior complex.”

“Oh, undoubtedly,” Jung Sook murmured sagely.

Mi Sook laughed again.  “I do love you, Jung Sook!  You have this amazing ability to make me laugh.  I can think of only one other person who ever possessed such a talent.”

Jung Sook’s brow wrinkled.  “Who?”

Sobering, Mi Sook sighed, “Han Sung.”

“Ah.  But his brother cannot make you laugh?”

“Honestly, our relationship has been so rife with angst since we met a month ago.  I have not yet tested his ability to make me laugh.”

Jung Sook sobered.  “Give him time.”

Mi Sook nodded her head.

“Truly.  Be patient.  I discovered that Soo Ho contained hidden depths I knew nothing about.  Nor would I have ever guessed they existed.  He seemed the silliest of men when I first learned of him.  I never would have dreamt that he could be a man of substance.  Or one to inspire my fantasies.”

“Your fantasies?” Mi Sook queried, intrigued.

Jung Sook wagged her eyebrows then sighed.  And climbed off the bed.  “I am sorry, but I must go.  I sent Bo A and Lady Bit Na on ahead of me this morning.  But I don’t want to leave my mother-in-law at the mercy of that silly gaggle of girls for long.”  She giggled again.  “Though, honestly, I should probably have phrased that the other way around.”

Mi Sook chuckled.  “Is your mother-in-law a force to be reckoned with?”

“She is rather.  But she has a wide and generous heart.  And I simply adore her!”  Jung Sook opened her bedchamber door.  “I shall come to visit you soon, my dear.  I hope you don’t spend the day suffering alone in here.”  She frowned in concern.

“I shall be fine,” Mi Sook responded bracingly. 

“Yes, you shall.  Good day!” Jung Sook whisked herself into the hallway before closing the door firmly behind her. 

A moment later, she was knocking lightly on the next door.  Dan Se opened it and spoke briefly with her.  She turned away from his relieved smile a moment later.  Absolutely convinced that the man adored his wife.

This Post Has One Comment

  1. Lucia

    Thank all Goddesses for Jung Sook

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