Rated C for Crack (Comedy)
Warning: this is the teaser for a crack (comedy) fanfic and is not at all to be taken seriously in any way, shape or form. If you do not have a sense of humor or do not like comedy, I would advise you do not read this.
Reader discretion is advised. (Only if you get easily offended, though.)
It was a dark and rainy night as the D.A.B. club collected in their underground lair. The members were having their weekly discussion on how to get their daughters to stop liking BTS. From the information the club had come up with about the band, BTS was a Chinese band, (or maybe they were Japanese?), the band had 7 members, which were all boys, (or at least that was what their daughters had claimed, they were sure that at least two of the band members were girls), and the ‘7’ members all looked like girls despite being boys.
I, being a male ARMY in my early twenties, had been recruited to go undercover to spy in the club. My persona was that my younger sister that I had raised was obsessed with BTS and that I was trying to make her stop listening to them. It was mostly true. I had a younger sister. That I had raised. And that liked BTS. But I wasn’t trying to stop her from listening to them.
I had been coming for a few weeks now, and had managed to obtain anonymity. From my few weeks in the club, I had concluded that these men knew simply nothing about BTS. Or teenagers. They said the girls liked BTS because they had nothing better to do with their time, or because the band had somehow hypnotized them into listening to their music.
Tonight we were telling BTS horror stories. As in the horrors of living with someone who loved BTS. Thankfully, I had prepared for just this thing. I often snuck into clubs like this, and the most common thing to do was tell stories about how the band had ruined their everyday lives. The first guy started his story.
“One day, I had come home from work early, and I found my daughter and her friends in the house all listening to BTS on full volume! Their voices assaulted my ears so badly I couldn’t hear for a whole day!”
Collective gasps rang out in the room.
“But that wasn’t the end of it. They were watching a music video. And those guys were so ugly I almost had to gauge my eyes out!”
I almost laughed. BTS wasn’t even close to ugly. In fact, if I had been born a girl I would’ve probably sat around and talked about how gorgeous they were all day long, just as my sister did.
All right, that’s it. I have literally no more of this right now, so I decided I’d post it as a teaser instead. Maybe I’ll write more of it when I’m not writing three other stories. Also, I need a name for the main character. If you have any ideas, comment them down below. – Purple Heart
Also, Happy 7th Birthday, BTS! It’s not quite the 13th where I am, but it is in Korea, so I thought I’d leave a note >_<