Taehyung rolled over and groaned. He’d fallen asleep only to wake himself up by moving. Pain had ricocheted throughout his back as he’d turned over onto it. He moved back to his side and looked at the bedroom door. Mari had been gone a long time. Where was she? It was pitch black outside. He felt certain it must be after midnight. He was starting to feel anxious.
She was his wife now. He wanted her with him. He wanted her to tend to his wounds. The cream had helped. He needed more of it. But he couldn’t apply it himself. He needed her.
She’d been true to her word and sent a servant to bring him breakfast. The same servant had returned with lunch and dinner. But Taehyung was beginning to grow hungry again. All three meals had been light fare. He was used to eating heartily. And his stomach appeared to have mended.
He lay for several minutes staring at that door across the room. It was very dimly lit by a small candle burning on a tiny table near it. Suddenly, the door opened quietly and a silent figure slipped into the room. As the candle illuminated her face, he sighed with relief.
“Where have you been all day?” he asked brusquely.
He hadn’t meant to sound accusing. But he was irritated that she had ignored her wounded husband all day long. After all, he had these bruises because of her.
She froze. She hadn’t expected him to be awake. She had intended to remain with him all day long tending to his wounds. But when she’d discovered he loved another, her heart had been so broken that she couldn’t face him. She was afraid her countenance would give her away. And the last thing she wanted was for Tae to know that she loved him.
“I was helping the queen,” she lied. Though, she had spent a couple hours with Moonflower.
“At midnight?” he queried sardonically. “Don’t lie to me, Mari. I cannot abide liars. Tell me where you were tonight.”
Instantly, he realized that he knew nothing of this woman. Perhaps she was in love with another man. A lover she’d had before she met Tae. Had she been having a secret assignation with her lover tonight?
He remembered how someone had remarked that she had been discovered in bed with a man before. Was Mari not a virgin then?
He felt himself grow more irritated. Why was he so disappointed? He didn’t believe she should be flogged, but he treasured chastity in a girl. Especially in the one who had married him. He had hoped to marry a girl who had waited for him. As he had waited for her. Of course, he’d also dreamed of marrying a girl who loved him. As he loved her.
“I know you were forced to marry me, but I must insist that you give up any admirers you had. I will not brook any infidelity.” His voice was steel.
Stricken to the heart that he would believe her capable of such treachery, she simply stared at him. He had just pushed her another mile away from him.
“I would also ask that you return to our room before nightfall each evening,” he continued in that crisp, mellow voice.
But it didn’t wrap her in any comfort. She felt like an ocean separated them now. She walked over and stared out the window.
Was it too late to become a nun? Could she move to a place of contemplation and quiet and leave this cold man behind? Could she beg to be released from their marriage to devote herself to religious duties for the rest of her life?
He clearly didn’t want to be married to her. They hadn’t consummated the marriage. She could prove she was still a virgin. If she did, would they free her?
She decided she would speak to Moonflower about it tomorrow.
“I do not wish to disturb you by sleeping in the same bed with you tonight. I know you must be having difficulty resting due to the pain. I will sleep on my couch.”
He couldn’t see her well in the dimly lit room, but something was different. She didn’t sound the same as she had this morning. She also wasn’t meeting his eyes.
“What’s his name?” he asked, oddly disappointed.
“Who?” she asked as she walked towards her couch.
“The man you’re in love with.”
That got her attention. Her head came up, and her eyes connected with his in surprise. Then an unreadable expression flitted across her face.
“I have no lover,” she replied.
Then a spasm of agony showed itself on her face for but a moment. He blinked, and it was gone. But he was sure he’d seen it. He felt his heart shift violently in his chest.
“You need no lover. You have a husband now.”
Cold comfort, indeed.
“Just what every girl wants,” she muttered.
“Pardon?” He quirked a dark eyebrow at her.
“Who needs love when they have marriage?” she mourned.
Taehyung felt his temper fraying. He was in pain, and all she could do was mock him for marrying her.
“Would you rather have a lover than a husband?” he countered.
She stared at him as her face leaked her agony. “I would rather have a husband who was a lover,” she retorted truthfully.
He frowned. What was she saying? That she was upset he didn’t love her? But that was absurd. They’d met only two nights ago. Surely, she couldn’t expect him to love her. Not yet, anyway.
“I know you didn’t choose to marry me. That you would never have chosen me. You were forced into a corner. You don’t even remember our wedding ceremony! I think,” she inhaled sharply, “I think I should ask the king for an annulment. It’s what’s best for us both. Perhaps he would let me take holy orders instead.”
Stung to his core, shocked, he cried out, “You would commit yourself to a life of celibacy – a life without children – just to escape from me?”
He sounded oddly hurt. But why? He loved Moonflower.
Her heart filling with sorrow, she walked quietly towards him. When she reached the bed, she sat on the edge of it as her eyes traced his beautiful face. She lifted her sad eyes to his.
“You are a noble man. You nearly died for me. I could not find a finer man to marry if I searched the whole of the kingdom. But you are clearly in love with another woman. I cannot compete with that. I have no wish to.
“It’s very plain you do not desire me. And I think, for my part, a life of celibacy would be easier than living with a man who desires another. I cannot give my body to a man who would cast aside my heart.” She looked away but not before he saw the sheen of tears in her eyes.
Breathlessly, he stared at her. Was she implying that he had broken her heart? But that was also absurd! How could she possibly love him already?
“I don’t understand. You’re not willing to give a marriage between us a chance?”
Her eyes found his again. “How do you feel about me? Give me your honest impression.”
He took a deep breath. How was he to answer such a question? He considered the woman he’d known for forty-eight hours.
“You are compassionate. You’re clearly brave too. You didn’t hesitate to help me when I needed it. Even though you risked a lashing.”
He paused. “Mari, who was the other man you were found in bed with?” When she didn’t say anything, he continued, “I am your husband. I think I have a right to know.”
She sighed. “Jungkook.”
“Jungkook!” He tried to sit straight up, but he hissed in pain.
She jumped up and headed for the jar of cream. She should have applied some to his back as soon as she’d discovered he was awake.
“Forgive me. Please. I should have put some ointment on your back as soon as I returned.”
“You slept with Jungkook?” he asked incredulously. Jungkook was all of sixteen!
She lifted sorrowful eyes to him. “You don’t have a very high opinion of me, do you? How many men do you think I’ve entertained in my chambers?”
She reached out and dipped her fingers into the cream before slathering it on his back.
“I have no idea. Why don’t you tell me?” He rested his head on his arm as she lightly rubbed the soothing cream into his aching muscles.
“Taehyung…” she responded. “I have never entertained any men in my bed. You are the only one who has ever slept in my bed at all.”
“But you said Jungkook…”
“Sat on my bed while I bandaged his cut knee when he was twelve years old.”
Taehyung felt himself growing angry again. “A boy! A twelve-year-old boy is the other man you had hidden in your bed?!”
“Right,” she breathed. “His father threatened to have me flogged.”
Horrified, he stared at her.
“I should just become a nun,” she murmured. “Then I’ll never have to see another man for as long as I live. No one will accuse me of seduction. I can live in peace.”
“Is that truly what you want, Mari?”
