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Chapter 5: A Place Called Home – February 15, 2021

Naru came to visit every single night that week.  On Monday, he brought them all dinner.  

As they sat at the table eating, he informed them all – but especially Ajin, “I’m returning to work tomorrow, so I won’t be coming over to play during the day for a while.”

She frowned, “Why not?” 

Her brow was a tiny thundercloud.

“Because my appa needs my help.  You understand?”

“No!  I’ve never had an appa!” she thundered as she jumped up from the table and ran into the other room.  

Her sob could be heard a moment before she reached the living room.  A tremor passed over Minha’s face as her eyes collided with his.  This was exactly what she’d feared.  She stood up.  But Naru reached out to grasp her lightly by the wrist.

“Let me,” he responded gently.

He stood up and followed the little girl.  Minha trailed him.  All the way to Ajin’s bedroom.

He knocked lightly on her door frame.

“Ajin?  Can I come in?”

“No!  Go away!  You don’t want to be my friend anymore!”

“Ajin, that is not true.  I adore you.  And I promise I’ll come play dolls with you every night.  I just have to go to work for a few hours each day.”

He entered her room.  She had thrown herself down onto her bed.  She lay on her tummy with her face pressed into her mattress.  Naru sat down next to her on the edge of the bed as Minha hovered silently in the doorway.

“I’m sorry, Ajin.  Adults have to go to work sometimes.  I know it stinks.  I would much rather play with you than deal with irate businessmen, but I have to earn money too.  You know your eomma goes to work every day, right?  She has to earn money to buy you things and so you can live in this nice house.  Well, I want to earn money to buy you things too.”

She lifted her head to look at him.  “I don’t need things, Uncle Naru!  I just need you!”  She sat up then. 

“I wished it worked that way,” he sighed.  “But I have to pay my bills too.  And my appa really does need my help.  He let me get by without doing much lately, but today he called me and asked me to come back.  It’s like when your eomma asks you to clean your bedroom.  Do you like to do it?”

She frowned and shook her head.

“But you do it, don’t you?”

She nodded.

“Why?”

She shrugged.

“You do it because you love your eomma.  Right?”

The little girl brightened and smiled.  But then she thought of all the times she’d failed to clean her room when asked.  Her lips relaxed.

“Well, I love my appa too, so I’m going back to work tomorrow.”

“But I thought you loved me!” she cried out.

“I do.  That’s why I’m going to come visit you at night.  I’ll stay each night until you go to sleep.  That way both you and my appa can see me.  Okay?”

She furrowed her tiny brow at him.  As his eyes traced the two minuscule lines that popped up between her eyebrows, she demanded, “Uncle Naru, why don’t you come live with us?  Then I’d get to see you at breakfast too.  Like Eomma.”

Naru’s eyes strayed to the woman standing in the doorway as he spoke to her daughter.

“Hmm.  Thank you for the invitation.  Let me think about that, will you?  I think we’d need to ask your eomma for permission too.”

“Eomma wouldn’t care.  She loves you too,” she answered matter-of-factly.  Her face suddenly brightened and she continued, “You could share my room.”  Ajin glanced down at the bed.  “See?  There’s plenty of space in this bed for both of us.”

Naru stifled the laughter bubbling up inside of him as he pictured himself falling off the edge of that bed in the middle of the night as her little body lay sprawled out across its tiny width.

“That is a very generous offer, Princess Ajin.  I humbly thank you for considering me worthy to share your bed.  But I think your eomma might protest.”

“Protest?”

“She might not like that idea.”

“Why?” 

His eyes met Minha’s.  “I’m thinking she might want me to share a bed with someone else,” he responded provocatively. 

Minha blushed to the roots of her hair and determined to bring this conversation to a swift end.  She marched into the room suddenly.

“Ajin.  You need to come finish your dinner.”

“Eomma?  Can Uncle Naru move in with us?  He can sleep with me.”

“He most certainly cannot,” Minha responded heatedly.

“Why not?” questioned her tiny tot.  “Whose bed should he sleep in?  Yours, Eomma?”

That delightful flush spread across Minha’s cheeks now and threatened to flood her forehead.  Naru grinned.

“Absolutely, Ajin!  What a capital idea!” he burst out and then chuckled when Minha shot him an annoyed glance.

“Right now, Uncle Naru needs to go home and sleep in his own bed.  His eomma and appa would miss him.  We don’t want to hog him all to ourselves and make them sad now, do we?”

“Please.  Hog me all to yourselves,” he murmured as his eyes caressed her.

“Yeah,” Ajin echoed his opinion.  “Let’s hog him all to ourselves.  I want Uncle Naru to stay with us!”  

She suddenly threw her little body straight at his chest.  He caught her and fell back onto her bed laughing.  Just like in Minha’s dream.  Was it coming true?  Was she losing her daughter to this wonderful man?

With a chuckle, he picked Ajin up and carried her back to the kitchen.  And Minha felt herself sinking.  Deeper into the quicksand that was Naru.  She was fervently praying that he was the good man he seemed to be.

They spent the evening together.  Working on projects for her class and entertaining Ajin.  She was sitting in his lap again before the end of the evening.  Every time that Minha glanced at them, her heart emitted a pang.

“Where should we go on Saturday?” Naru suddenly asked Ajin.

Her tiny face lifted to look at him.  “What?”

“I forgot to tell you that I’m taking you and your eomma somewhere on Saturday.  Like a date.”

Her eyes lit up.  “What’s a date?”

“It’s when two people who are getting to know each other go out somewhere to have fun together.”

Ajin looked from him to her eomma.  “But there’s three of us.”

“That’s because you and your eomma are special.  You are a package deal.”

Her tiny brow furrowed.  “What does that mean?”

“It means that you come together.  You can’t separate one from the other.”

Ajin beamed at her eomma.  “We’re a package deal, Eomma!”

Minha smiled at her little darling.  “That’s right, Ajin, we are.”  

Her eyes collided with Naru’s then.  And he sent her a speaking glance that buzzed her all the way to her toes.

“So…where shall we go?”

Ajin’s eyes lit up.  “The aquarium!”

His brows flew up.  “The aquarium?  What do you want to see there?  Are you hoping to swim with the dolphins?”

“Silly,” she purred.  “You can’t swim with the dolphins.”  Then she turned towards her eomma.  “Can you, Eomma?”

“Not at the aquarium, darling.”

The little girl’s eyes grew wide.  “Where can I swim with dolphins?” she asked with awe vibrating her voice.

“Geoje,” Naru responded.

“Really?” breathed both Ajin and Minha at the same time.

“Where’s Geoje?” Ajin asked next.

“Not too far away.  It’s an island.  It’s about an hour and a half from here.”

“Can we go?” The little girl bounced up and down.

“During the summer when the weather is warmer.  I wouldn’t want you to catch a chill, Ajin.”

She pouted.  Minha glanced at Naru.  The summer.  About four months from now.  The length of time she’d dated Beopdung.  Would Naru still be here then?  Courting her.  Playing with her daughter.  Making them both happy.

Don’t promise something you won’t deliver.

Her eyes probed his countenance.  He turned to smile at her, but the intense expression in her gaze got to him, and his grin faltered.  

“What is it?”

“I was just thinking that four months is a long time.  A lot could happen between now and then,” she murmured quietly.

He suddenly wondered how long her relationship with Ajin’s appa had lasted.  He bookmarked that thought to return to it after they tucked Ajin into bed tonight.

“So…is the aquarium our destination for Saturday then?”

A little head bobbed up and down.

“Perfect!” Naru exclaimed.  “I can’t wait!”

“Me neither!” Ajin bounced up and down on his knee.

“Ajin, go brush your teeth.  It’s time for bed.”

“Awwwww.  Eomma, do I have to?  Can’t I stay up a few more minutes?” she whined.

“I’ll tell you what,” Naru leaned forward to whisper conspiratorially into her ear.  “You head to bed right now, and in the morning I will bring you breakfast.  And you’ll get to meet my Jungju.”

“Your nephew?” Her eyes grew wide.  

She bounced harder now.  Then she jumped off his lap and ran for the bathroom.  He chuckled as he watched her go.  Then, his humor faded as he turned towards Minha.

“How long were you and Beopdung together?” he murmured.  

They were alone now.  Maeum had headed into the kitchen to finish the dinner dishes a few minutes ago.

“Four months.”

“Ahhh.”  Just as he had thought.  “So…you’re thinking that if I’m going to give up on you two, we’ll never make it to Geoje.”

Her eyes careened into his.  How had he read her mind so well?  

It terrified her.  

She dropped her gaze.

She cleared her throat.  He reached out and rested his hand over hers.  Then his thumb began to caress the top of her hand.   Her fourth digit, to be exact.

“Do I need to put a ring on that finger to convince you I’m serious?” he queried quietly.

Her head snapped up, and her eyes locked with his again.  “What?”  She blinked.  “We haven’t even been on two dates.”

He grinned ruefully.  “No,” he responded, chagrinned.  “We’ve been on one absolute disaster of a date.  But we have kissed several times.  Amazing, earth-shattering kisses.”

She gasped.  “You cannot think so!  Surely you’ve kissed a dozen girls more deeply than you’ve kissed me.”  

Ehh.  

She didn’t want to think of that.  Why was she dating a playboy?

He’d kissed more than a dozen girls more intimately than he’d ever kissed Minha.  But…

…there was something about her kiss.  A quality he could not define.  Or quantify.  Something that drew him in and made him want more while also supplying him with the patience to wait for the more.

His eyes caressed her lips.  “Are you inviting me to kiss you more deeply, Minha?” he asked a very provoking question. 

She looked away from him.  “No.  My point was…how long were you with those girls?  And your relationship with them was more serious. More mature.”

“No.  It was not.  My connection to them was frivolous.  On the surface.  Sex only.  My heart was never involved.”

He paused as he tilted his head to the side, considering her.  “Do you know how easy it is to have sex?  Do you know how hard it is to cherish someone enough to say no to the temptation?  Yet stay with her anyway?  

“The path of temperance is more mature.  Any immature boy can take a girl to bed.  And believe me, this one did.  More times than I can count.”

He saw her cringe as he said that last.  “I’m sorry,” he murmured.  “I wish I could take them all back.  I wish I could present you with a completely different record.  A spotless one.  That I had had the level of maturity required to say no.  To wait for one who would cherish me as I cherish her.”  

His eyes were making love to her right now, even if the remainder of his body was not.

“My record is hardly spotless either,” she murmured quietly.

“Uncle Naru!” Ajin came running into the room and catapulted herself into his lap again.  “I’m ready for bed!”

Minha smiled sadly at her daughter.  She felt invisible when Naru was around.  

“Come tuck me in, Uncle Naru,” the tiny girl tugged on his hand and jumped off his lap.  He stood up, but he stopped when Minha did not also rise.

“Aren’t you coming?”

She shook her head as she fought back tears.  Stupid, jealous tears.  “She doesn’t want me.  Just you.  Go ahead.  I’ll wait out here.”

She’d whispered the words so quietly that her daughter hadn’t heard them.  But Naru had.  Perplexed, he stared down at her.  

“Uncle Naru, come on!”  An insistent hand tugged on his again.

Staring back at Minha’s bent head, he nonetheless followed her daughter to her room.

He sat on the bed and wished her a good night.  The child looked around.  “Where’s Eomma?”

“She thought you didn’t want her,” he murmured.

The little girl frowned.  She jumped from her bed and went running out to the living room to berate her tearful mother.

“Eomma!” she stood in front of her mother and put her little hands on her hips.  “Why aren’t you tucking me in?  I need my bedtime kiss.”

Surprised, Minha lifted sad eyes to her daughter as she reached up to wipe away a tear.  “I thought you wanted only Naru,” she whispered.

“No,” the child responded with a frown.  “I need my eomma!”  One little foot stamped the floor.  She held her hand out expectantly to her mother.  

Minha smiled tremulously at her as she reached out to take the little girl’s hand.  She stood up and followed her.  Naru was waiting for them on the side of the bed.  Ajin climbed into the center of the bed.  

“Uncle Naru, you lay there.  Eomma, you lay there.”  She pointed at the opposite edges of her bed.  She wanted to be surrounded by them both tonight.

“What?” Minha asked.  Her heart was suddenly racing.

Naru grinned widely at her.  Then he squeezed himself along the edge of Ajin’s bed.  

“Come on, Eomma.  You heard your daughter.  She wants to snuggle with us.”  

She could hear the pleasure in his voice.  It tugged the corners of her mouth upward.  She surrendered and hugged her edge of the bed.  

Ajin smiled too.  “Closer,” she whispered, completely dissatisfied with their proximity to her.

Minha scooted closer to her.  Naru did too.  Minha rested her head on the edge of her daughter’s pillow.  And let her arm settle over her waist.  Naru reached out and grasp her fingers with his own.  Their eyes met in the semidarkness of the room.  Over Ajin.

“Goodnight, Eomma.  Goodnight, Uncle Naru.”  Her little voice echoed around them.

They both leaned up at the same time to kiss her cheeks, one on each side.  Ajin grinned as she was doubly bussed.  Then they all settled their heads down.  Minha closed her eyes.  She was hiding from Naru.  But he squeezed her fingers then to let her know he could still see her.  She grinned in response but kept her eyes firmly shut.  

They all lay there packed together for several long minutes.  About the time that Ajin’s breathing evened out, so did Minha’s.  He squeezed her hand again.  But her fingers had gone limp.  She too was asleep.  

He sighed.  He knew where her room was.  He had helped Maeum paint it a couple weeks ago.

He got up and headed that way.  He turned down the covers on her bed.  He glanced around her room.  He had loved it from the first moment he’d entered it.  It was cluttered.  But it was a happy feeling.  

He’d grown up in a sterile house.  Everything was black and white.  Every surface was empty.  It looked like it belonged in a magazine, for heavens’ sake!  It wasn’t a home.  

But this warm room was a home.  The walls were a happy yellow.  Color burst forth from her dresser.  The roses he’d given her were in a vase in the center of its surface.  Her walls were adorned with stick figures, hearts, and rainbows that Ajin had drawn on pieces of paper for her.  Her desk was stacked high with projects she was working on for school.  But, otherwise, everything else was fairly neat and orderly.  She’d folded some clothes and laid them over the chair in the corner.  A book lay on her nightstand next to a lamp and a box of Kleenex.  

It was a cozy room.  A room he’d love to stay in with her.  He could picture himself wrapped in her arms in that bed.  A lazy smile on his face.  He pictured Ajin running into their room in the early morning and catapulting up onto their bed with a hollered, “Appa!  Eomma!  Wake up and come play with me!”  

Of course, at that point, he’d probably rather play with her eomma, but the scene made him smile.  And he began to understand how much he was craving a spot here.  Not just in this bed.  But in this house.  In this family.

Something had happened to him during the last few weeks as he had helped her grandmother and played with her daughter here.  He had begun to feel like this was his home.  Like they were his family.  Now, he yearned for them.  For a place among them.  He never wanted to lose that feeling of belonging.

He returned to Ajin’s room and bent to pick up Minha.  Once he had her settled in his arms, he carried her down the hallway to her room.  He laid her gently down in her bed and pulled the covers up around her.  She must have been exhausted.  She hadn’t even roused as he’d jostled her.  He bent over her, smiling down at her pretty face.  

He felt a little sad.  He hadn’t gotten his goodnight kiss tonight.  So he decided to steal it from her slumbering lips.  He bent closer and brushed those sweet lips with his own.  He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of peaches again.  And smiled.  

“I love you, Minha.  Sleep tight, love.”  

He whispered those seven words and then disappeared out the door.   So very sorry that he had to go home to a sterile house full of cold memories.