Chapter 10: Dancing in the Rain – June 13 – 28, 2021
“I can’t find Yun,” Tae commented a few minutes later.
“She probably had to go outside to find reception,” Eunji responded.
Tae nodded. But before he could become too concerned, she returned to the room.
He glanced up at her. Her nose was pink. Were her eyes red-rimmed? Had she been crying?
He peered closely at her. “Would you like to hold him?” he offered as he held the tiny baby out to her.
She smiled. “Pretty soon I’ll get to hold one of these whenever I feel like it.” She reached for the little boy and cooed down at him. “Hello, Tiny Tae, how are you this evening, little one?”
Tae watched her, his heart bleeding out of his eyes. She was a natural. She was going to be an amazing mother. Why didn’t she have the same kind of faith in her character that he did?
Namjoon and Eunji stared at Tae as he observed Yun. Then their eyes collided. They could both tell that Tae was head over heels for the young woman. He was a complete goner. But it was just as obvious that Yun was oblivious to his true feelings.
Eunji felt bad for her. Because she had seen the way Yun had looked at Tae before she’d evacuated the room a little while ago. And if she wasn’t mistaken, the girl had come back teary-eyed. She probably thought that Tae wanted nothing to do with her romantically anymore. Especially now that she was pregnant with another man’s baby.
But Eunji had noticed his absence. He was hardly ever home these days. And whenever she asked Namjoon about his brother, his response was, “He’s with Yun.”
Clearly, Tae had it bad for the girl. But she didn’t seem to know it. How could she be so blind? His love for her poured out of his eyes every time he looked at her.
Eunji had been surprised when Tae had broken up with his girlfriend after nearly a year and a half of dating her exclusively. Eunji had hoped that it had nothing to do with her, her wedding to Namjoon, or the impending birth of their child. Tae and Yun had been happily hanging out together for over a year before they broke up.
Eunji had been just as shocked to learn that Yun was dating someone else. She had always seemed to be head over heels for Tae. What had gone so terribly wrong? And would the two friends ever find their way back to each other?
After a few moments of loving on the little baby, Yun handed him back to his eomma with a murmured, “He’s beautiful, Eunji. Just beautiful. Congratulations.” Then, “We should let you get some rest. You’ve had a trying day I’m sure.”
But as she turned away, Eunji grasped her around her wrist. Yun glanced down in surprise at her arm where Eunji’s long fingers were wrapped around it. Then Eunji spoke.
“It’s totally worth it. You made the right choice. You’ll see.” Then she smiled sweetly at her.
As Yunseong gazed down at the new mother, she realized that Eunji had also gotten pregnant outside of wedlock. At least, in her case, she’d already been engaged to the appa. So they had just moved up the date of their wedding. But Yunseong had no fiancé. No prospective husband. She had made the difficult choice to keep her baby and raise her alone. She envied the woman who was trying to lend her strength and confidence this evening. Hadn’t she always been jealous of Eunji? Yunseong took one last long glance at that beautiful baby before she turned and walked out the door.
She never would have made any other choice concerning her baby. She believed all life was precious. But the future was terrifyingly scary. She didn’t have a sweet man to fall back on. She was going to have to raise this little darling all alone. Tonight that truth was eating her heart alive.
“I don’t know if I can do it,” she whispered to Tae as they walked to his car.
“Do what?”
“Be everything this baby needs. Am I being selfish believing that I can do this alone? Tiny Tae came into this world with two doting parents. Eunji has Namjoon to fall back on. And Namjoon has Eunji for support. But my baby will have only me.”
“And me, Uncle Tae-Tae,” he responded effortlessly; though, he wanted to say something completely different. “And Auntie Yuni and Uncle Jungkookie and a doting grandma and grandpa. And Uncle Yunseok. You’re not alone, Yun. You’re surrounded by a whole army that loves your little baby.”
He reached out and wrapped his hand around hers. “Chin up, my dear. Everything is going to be all right.”
As she turned to look at Tae, she could almost believe him.
—
“Yun, will you be my maid of honor?”
Yuni had asked her way back in December, right after Jungkook had asked her to marry him. And right before she’d lost her head over Seonghan. But now, they were fast approaching Yuni’s wedding date. She and Jungkook were getting married in less than five weeks. Yuni had already chosen her wedding dress, but Yun had felt too awful to shop for a dress herself. Now that school was out for the summer and her nausea had abated, she was willing to visit the dress shop.
So, despite her fatigue, on a bright summer’s day near the end of June, Yun allowed herself to be dragged to the bridal shop to try on bridesmaid gowns. The twins had vastly different taste, so she expected this afternoon to be a bit of a battle. But she was pleasantly surprised when Yuni agreed to the first gown she picked out. It was a stunning, emerald green and brought out the beautiful color of her eyes. It was an off-the-shoulder dress made of two layers down to the waist, the top layer of which was created of gauze, which billowed out and would disguise any baby bump that had developed by then. The dress also had a gauze skirt that fell all the way to her knees in beautiful folds.
“Yun. You look stunning in that dress,” her eomma informed her as she watched her pregnant daughter spinning in a circle before the tall mirrors lining two walls of the dress shop.
“You really do!” Yuni exclaimed. “If you like it, then that’s the one!”
Yun gazed dispassionately at her reflection. In the old days, she would have cared how she looked. Now she recognized that no matter how beautiful this dress was, it wouldn’t heal her broken heart, or provide her with a good husband, or give her baby an adoring appa. She watched the way Jungkook doted on Yuni, and she fought constant feelings of jealousy. Her twin was about to marry the love of her life, and Yun wanted to be happy for her.
She was happy for her. But she was also very sad for herself. If she had simply walked the path Yuni had, things would be so different now. Though, honestly, Tae had never quite treated her the way Jungkook treated Yuni. Tae had always seemed a bit preoccupied. Even from the beginning of their relationship. Distracted by video games, or friends, or memories. She’d never been exactly sure what took up the real estate in his brain. A quiet corner of her heart had always felt like she occupied little space in his head. Which may have been one reason she had been so delighted by Seonghan’s intent pursuit of her.
Still, if she had just listened to her sister’s repeated warnings, she wouldn’t be in the world of trouble in which she was currently drowning. She might have still been alone. But she wouldn’t be facing the uncertain future of raising a baby by herself. And of trying to finish college while doing it.
These were the heavy thoughts weighing her down during what should have been a joyous occasion. She sighed.
“It’s fine, Yuni. If you like it, then we’re done.”
Yuni glanced at her eomma, who pierced her eyes with her own. A silent communication passed between them. Yuni turned towards Yun.
“Hey, wanna go get some ice cream now that the hard work is done?”
Yun smiled at her. “Sure. Ice cream always makes me happy.”
But she didn’t sound very happy.
Half an hour later, Yun was sitting in a booth at the ice cream parlor thoroughly enjoying her turtle sundae when a deep voice suddenly breathed into her ear.
“Hello, beautiful. I came here to buy you some turtle ice cream, but apparently, you didn’t need my assistance tonight.”
She jumped and spun around while her eomma and Yuni grinned at each other.
“Tae! You startled me!” she rebuked him loudly.
“Mea culpa,” he murmured. “I’ll buy you the turtle ice cream anyway as an apology. You can pop it in your freezer to use during an emergency.”
Her lips quirked. “An emergency?”
“Mmhmm.” He nodded sagely.
“What kind of emergency?”
“You know,” he responded, “the worst kind. An ice cream emergency.”
“That’s the worst kind of emergency?” she asked dryly.
“Have you ever had an ice cream emergency? If you haven’t, I can understand why you would downplay it. But if you have, then you know what I’m talking about.”
She chuckled then at his silliness, and once again her eomma’s eyes slid towards Yuni’s. They smirked at each other. It was quite apparent to them both that Yun was still in love with her ex-boyfriend. And that he was not indifferent to her either.
How many guys would spend this much time and money caring for a pregnant girl when they’d had absolutely nothing to do with the creation of the child growing in her belly?
“Tae? Would you like to join us?” their eomma asked sweetly.
His eyes met hers. “I would love to. Especially if Yun feels like sharing that turtle sundae she’s hogging to herself right now.”
Yun shot him an outraged look. “You’re eyeing my turtle sundae?! Get one of your own, please! I’m already eating for two!”
“Touché,” he bowed to her. “So sorry. I shall return with my own in a moment.” He smiled at her mother and sister before heading for the line.
“Really, Yun! You could be nicer to your best friend!” Yuni breathed in her ear. “That boy has been nothing but adorable to you this past month.”
“Longer than that…” her eomma murmured.
Yun glanced at them both. “What?” Her eyes grew round. “I’m just hungry. That’s all. You know what they say…don’t get between a pregnant girl and her ice cream.”
—
Later that night, after Tae had headed home, Yunyeong stepped into Yunseong’s room and climbed into bed with her.
“You’re still in love with Tae, aren’t you?” she whispered.
They were lying in the dark, so she couldn’t see Yunseong’s eyes pop open in alarm.
“What does it matter?” Yunseong breathed, her heart breaking open.
“It matters. I think…I think he’s not indifferent to you, Yun.”
“You’re wrong. He’s just being sweet to a pregnant girl. He’s still in love with Eunji. If you had seen the way he looked at her when he was holding his nephew…I can’t compete with that kind of love. I never could. And I never will.”
Yunyeong fell silent for a moment, then her voice softly punctuated the stillness, “Yun. Eomma and Appa said that Jungkook can move in with us when we get married. So I’ll still be near. I can help you with your baby. You know? So you can get a job or do schoolwork or just anytime you need a break.”
Yun’s heart melted. Yunseong reached over and gave her sister a hug. “Thanks, Yuni. You’re the best sister a girl could have.”
“Thank you, Yun.”
“For what?”
“For agreeing to be in my wedding still. I know it hurts.”
Yunseong stared at the outline of her twin’s face.
“If I were in your shoes, and I saw you about to marry Tae, my heart would be hurting. I’d be wondering why life was so cruel to me.”
“Yuni.” Yunseong cringed. “Life has been much crueler to you than it has to me. You paid a heavy and horrid price for one mistake. I chose my path and got punished with a new life. It’s hardly the same thing. Truthfully, I’ve been given a gift.”
“And a whole scary world of responsibility. I love your baby, Yun. But I’m so sorry you have to walk this path alone. I never liked Seonghan. But I would never wish for you to be struggling through this by yourself.”
“I’m not by myself, Yuni. I have you, and Seokie, and Eomma, and Appa, and Tae. I’m not alone at all.”
She would just keep telling herself that. Maybe one of these days it would feel like the truth.
—
The summer began to sail past them. Tae continued with her through her first trimester. But as it was coming to an end and she began to feel better, she had to find a job to start saving towards taking care of her baby. There would be birthing expenses in addition to all the baby supplies she needed.
The last week in June, while Tae was at work, she began her job hunt. She walked miles that day applying at many of the retail shops and restaurants within walking distance of her house. Near lunch time, she began to droop. Truthfully, she was exhausted.
She was in the last week of her first trimester, and the nausea had abated. She wasn’t puking in the morning anymore, thankfully. But she also wasn’t used to walking miles each day. So at noon, she stopped in at a ramen shop and dropped into a booth after ordering her meal. At least, she was ravenous and had no fear of her bowl of soup revisiting her.
Suddenly, Tae appeared before her. He stood staring in through the window at her. But she was looking blankly off into the shop somewhere and didn’t see him. He entered the restaurant a moment later and made a beeline for her.
“Yun! Fancy meeting you here! Are you grabbing some ramen?” He was smiling down at her.
She nodded. “Aren’t you usually at work at this time of day?”
“I had a meeting with a client a couple blocks away. I came here to enjoy a bowl of ramen. You know how much I enjoy the food here.”
She grinned. “Go order some, and you can sit with me.”
He gazed down at her with concern. “Yun, are you okay? You look like you’re wilting.”
“Thanks, Tae,” she responded, annoyed. “I’m exhausted. I’ve spent all morning looking for a job. I must have entered a hundred shops to fill out applications.” She twisted her mouth in disappointment. “I was going to continue after lunch, but now I think I’ll have to head home and take a nap instead.”
“Yun, why haven’t you applied at my appa’s company?”
She stared up at him as she struggled to keep her eyes open. “Tae, you are a darling. But I’m not qualified to work there. I’m not a business major. Or anything close. Nope. It’s either retail or food for me. Unless I can get a job as a nanny. But that sounds exhausting. Besides, who’s going to hire a pregnant girl as a nanny?”
“I’m serious, Yun. Apply at my company. I’ve got connections.” He flashed his boxy smile at her.
She grinned up at him. “Go get some ramen, and I’ll think about it.” Then she put her head down on the table and closed her eyes.
She’d probably walked from her house. What was that? Three or four miles? And she was so exhausted that she couldn’t even stay awake sitting down. He would definitely be giving her a ride home.
But, as she ate the ramen, she began to revive. They spoke of this and that as they ate. Then he offered her a ride home. She accepted. Gratefully.
However, the walk to his car was a half mile. And even before they left the ramen shop, the skies suddenly let loose of a mighty downpour. They waited a little while, but then Tae realized he had just enough time to take her home before he had to head to a meeting. So he reached for her hand and pulled her out into the rain.
They ran a little way, but she couldn’t keep up. He was tempted to scoop her up in his arms and run the remainder of the way to his car, but he realized they’d get soaked either way. So he stopped running and tugged on her hand to pull her closer to him. They walked briskly through the downpour. But at one point, she stopped to look up at the rain falling down upon them.
“It’s so beautiful, Tae. So unexpected. But we need it. We wouldn’t have food without this rain.” She held her hand up and caught some of the drops in her palm. Something about her stance reminded him of a dance they had attended once. He bowed before her and reached out his hand to touch her elevated one.
“May I have this dance?” he whispered roughly as he beamed down at her.
She giggled. “Why, certainly, kind sir!”
He took her hand and twirled her around. They danced for a couple of minutes before they realized that people had stopped to watch them. Embarrassed, Yun tugged on his hand.
“Come on, Tae! We’d better go, so you’re not late for work.”
But he stood frozen as the rain drenched him, and he simply stared at her. “I don’t care if I’m late,” he murmured after a moment.
She glanced sharply at him. “Tae,” she whispered, but something in his face stilled her.
“Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?” he murmured as his hand pulled her close to him.
Startled, she stared up at him with bewildered eyes. She was soaked to the skin. And well aware that her tiny frame didn’t hide her developing baby bump anymore. Now her clothes were clinging to her too.
But the expression in his eyes was undoing her. He seemed mesmerized by something he saw in her gaze. For a moment, she let him pull her close to him. But then a passerby jostled her, and the only thing that saved her from hitting the ground was Tae’s hand around hers. He pulled her close and then ushered her towards his car. A few moments later, she sat shivering in his front seat while he adjusted the air conditioner. They did not need it blowing on them.
They rode in silence to her house. But, when they arrived, she glanced at him.
“Tae, you can’t possibly go to work soaked to the skin. Come inside and dry off. I bet Seokie has an outfit you could borrow.”
“A business suit?”
“He wore something nice to a wedding once. I’ll check his closet while you take a quick shower.”
“Okay.”
He headed for the shower while she invaded her brother’s domain. She found what she was looking for a few minutes later. She was stepping into the hallway when she saw Tae open the door to the bathroom. He stepped out wearing only a towel around his waist. She swallowed. Hard. She’d seen Tae shirtless before. They’d often gone swimming together in his parents’ pool. But she didn’t remember him looking this good. Was he working out with Jungkook these days?
The sight of Tae’s bare torso was also triggering memories of the very fit Seonghan. She cleared her throat, trying to dispel the tension sliding along her nerves. She was struggling with pangs of desire as she stared at Tae. He turned his head towards her and smiled. His wet hair was making him even more attractive. His dark locks were falling across his forehead rakishly.
“Did you find some clothes?” his deep voice wrapped around her and, in combination with his half-naked body, made that little hallway seem positively tiny.
Staring blindly at him, she nodded. He strode towards her and collected them. His fingers brushed hers as he accepted the shirt and pants from her. She felt little shards of electricity buzzing along her nerves.
“Thank you,” he murmured as he stood gazing down at her.
She swallowed as her gaze strayed to the glorious expanse of bare flesh right in front of her eyes. They slid along his elegant collarbone before traveling lower. She sighed. Tae was a dream come true. In more ways than one. Once again, she felt a pang of envy for the woman who would one day marry him.
Tae was watching her out of hooded eyes. She didn’t seem oblivious to him in his shirtless state. Could it be that she was still more attracted to him than he would have guessed?
“Does your brother have a tie?” he mumbled, just to have something to say to her.
“My appa does. I’ll find you one.” But she didn’t move, and her eyes had traveled to his torso again.
He reached out and touched her cheek. Which action startled her. Her eyes flew to his face. Her heart had just shot out of her chest. Did he have any idea how badly he was testing her right now?
The man was positively gorgeous and quite tempting when he was fully clothed. But when he was half-naked and standing before an experienced woman, he was doubly disconcerting. She shook herself as her eyes collided with his. His fingers were now sliding behind her ear, carrying a lock of her hair with them. And sending more shafts of electricity to dance along her nerves. Just a different set this time.
Why did he look like he wanted to kiss her?
She froze. Trapped in his gaze. Then, suddenly, his face broke into a wide grin.
“Thanks, Yun,” he responded lightly before turning to walk back to the bathroom.
She wandered down to her parents’ bedroom and rifled through her appa’s tie collection until she’d found the perfect one. Then she went in search of Tae again. The sooner he was on his way, the better.
—
He surprised her a moment later. He stepped out of the bathroom. This time he was fully dressed. But as she approached him with the tie, he bent a questioning glance upon her.
“Yun, could you help me put the tie on? I still have trouble knotting them properly.”
She grinned at him. She had helped her brother more times than she could count. He’d been required to wear one in high school every day. That might be why he owned none now.
“Sure,” she murmured as she reached up to loop the tie over his head.
She took her time smoothing it out under the collar of his shirt. Then her nimble fingers made quick work of the knot. She ran her fingertips along the tie down the front of his chest a moment later as her eyes surveyed him to ensure he looked amazing. He did.
“You’re all set,” she informed him with a smile.
Their eyes collided then, and he had to forcibly control himself. So as not to kiss her. Her pretty, pink lips seemed to be beckoning him in that moment. And he would have sworn her eyes were too.
