Namjoon spent the entire night poring over the pages of her book while Breeze slept on in his arms. He knew he would never experience another night like this one, even if he lived a thousand years. Could there possibly be another girl like Breeze? A young woman who would pour her heart out for years into the pages of a notebook and then painstakingly type every word in the burning hope that he would one day read them. A woman who would enroll in a foreign university and attempt to master a strange tongue just to walk where he had walked and experience some of the life that had shaped his soul. A girl stubbornly clinging to the crazy dream that she would one day meet him and put her thoughts into his hands. Believing they would change his life. And she’d been right. They had. It amazed him even now. Now that he had known her for twenty-two hours. Now that he had read every single word; though, he was still absorbing most of them. He wanted to read her book over and over again.
Reading her heart had been a painful, heartrending experience. Though sometimes he had laughed at funny things she’d written on those pages. Whether he was laughing or crying, she was contained in every single word. It was her heart, her soul, her mind, her thoughts, her emotions, her dreams, her hopes, her fears, her love that he had found there. And he wanted more. More of her. He wanted to be even closer to her. And he was beginning to want to share himself with her. In the intimate ways that she had bared her own soul to him. He had so few people in his life that he could be real with. And even fewer of them were women. His eomma. His sister. And he barely saw them. Nought else, really. But now he had Breeze.
Her words had caused him to reflect upon huge portions of his own life. He had known that his words were reaching people. It was true. But he had had no idea how deeply many of them had been rooted in one precious heart. Now one question remained: what was he going to do with that heart?
He gazed down at her as he set her book on the floor. She was still snuggled up against his chest, her leg thrown up over both of his. If he didn’t hold tightly to her, she’d fall off the couch. He tried to scoot closer to the back of the couch but gained only another inch or two of space. He pulled her closer as he moved down to lie next to her. It was nearly six o’clock already. Perhaps he’d just close his eyes for a few moments…
—
As he’d read her letters that night, a plan had begun to form in his mind. Now he sat at his desk, a pen in his hand, a notebook before him, as he prepared to put his own thoughts down on paper. What did a man write to the lover of his soul?
Namjoon put the pen to good use as he began to write, “Dear Breeze.” He decided to follow her lead and begin the letter with three words. Though his were three she hadn’t strung together in any of her letters.
“I love you.”
Then he continued by quoting some of Love Maze.
“‘We must believe only in ourselves. Can’t let go of each other’s hands. We need to be together forever.’
“Breeze, will you hold my hand forever? Will you stay by my side, even when it’s hard? Even when an ocean separates us?
“‘People say that I’ll end up a fool. But I don’t wanna use my head…I still wanna try…Take my…hand. Don’t let go…come closer…never go away…Just focus on me then in the darkness. Just the two of us is enough…If we’re together, even an endless maze is paradise.’”
It was how he felt about her.
“I believe in us, Breeze. I think we can make this work. I think you can hold my hand even across an ocean. As long as we keep our eyes firmly fixed on each other, we’ll make it through. I promise not to look at any of those other girls who are looking at me. When I talk to them, I’ll imagine your face is the one I’m looking at, your blue eyes are the ones I’m staring into. Will you do the same for me? Not noticing the cute guy sitting next to you in your college class or the neighbor who moved in next door? Or the guy you bumped into at the coffee shop? I’m already filling that role in your life.
“Will you wait for me, Breeze? Am I worth it? You’ve seen me. Do you like what you see?
“‘Even on this mysterious path, we’re taking care of each other. I always think even if eternity is hard, I wanna try it.’
“Seven years might feel like an eternity. It might be hard. But it would be better than living without you.
“‘Let’s be forever. Our own mountain. Our own climb. Our own world. Our own heart.’
“Breeze, stay with me. I love you.”
“Love, Joonie.”
The light creeping through the windows roused Namjoon from his slumber. He opened his eyes. He hadn’t actually written her that letter. He’d simply dreamed the whole scene. But it was a letter he needed to write. He glanced down at Breeze, her head still nestled into the curve of his shoulder over his heart. This was where she belonged forever. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.
Ahhhhhh this is killing me