Mahogany Eyes – Book 7: The Disheartened Darling
Chapter 34: I Owe You One – December 20
He had noticed that she’d worn only two different dresses to the symphony. He was assuming that those two garments were the only ones she found worthy of him. Which meant that she was probably stressing over what to wear. He knew her well enough by now to know that she was a bit of a people pleaser. She wouldn’t want to embarrass Yoongi by appearing poor.
But the truth was that nothing Alexis did could ever embarrass him. He was quite proud of his new friend. And he didn’t care if she wore that stunning, red dress every single night of the week. She really did look ravishing in it….
On second thought, perhaps she should retire it. He didn’t need any help causing his rebellious thoughts to run wild.
She needed a new dress. He realized it on Sunday morning. After she’d worn both the ravishing, red dress and an elegant, black number. As he watched her stumble out to the kitchen after rising late in the morning, he questioned her.
“Are you feeling okay?”
She glanced up at him with bleary eyes. “What?” She coughed. “Oh. Yes. I’m just tired still. That’s all. And I’m thirsty!” She headed for the sink to pour herself a glass of water.
“I worked you too hard on those ornaments this week, didn’t I? Admit it. You didn’t get proper rest.”
She shook her head. “No! Yoongi, I just adore painting ornaments. It was fun. Not work. I think I’m just entering a new phase. In which this little darling saps all my energy.” She began to sip her water hungrily as her other hand caressed her slender belly.
She still couldn’t believe that she’d already sold nearly four hundred ornaments over the last two days. Her sales had been limited only by her stock. She’d sold out the first night. And last night too. She’d managed to finish decorating a hundred ornaments yesterday, but only seventy-five of them had been dry in time to attend the symphony with her.
Today would be a busy day. She was going to work hard to finish as many decorations as she could before tonight. Thankfully, Yoongi had a fan he’d allowed her to borrow. Its stiff winds shortened the drying time of her pretty creations.
He eyed her skeptically. “Are you sure you’re not working too hard?”
She bobbed her head and swallowed one last drink of water. “I am.”
“So, you’re really up to painting another four hundred ornaments this week?”
“I think I can do it. I mean, it’s only a hundred a day. I’ve got it streamlined now. A bit of an assembly line. I paint all the white parts first, then move on to the red. Then the green…it doesn’t take nearly as long as it did the first two days I was making a lot. And if I don’t get them done, I don’t get them done. I’m just surprised you could find so many wooden cut-outs.”
“I might know a guy…who knows a guy,” he grinned at her, and she laughed.
“Oh? You know a guy, do you? I suppose that means that I know a guy…who knows a guy…who knows a guy.”
“That’s a lot of guys.”
“Three’s a crowd.” Her lips curved into a teasing smile.
“I hope this doesn’t mean I have some competition,” he murmured provocatively. Without thinking about it.
She stopped and stared at him. “Competition?” she queried faintly. “For what?”
But he chose not to answer that question. Instead, he cleared his throat and pressed on to more urgent – and less dangerous – matters.
“After breakfast, I’d like to take you out to shop.”
“To shop?” She was completely at a loss now. She glanced around their apartment. “What more do we need? We have a Christmas tree, lights,” she held up two fingers. A third joined them as she added, “ornaments.” Then her pinky finger popped up as she continued, “Dasik.” She wrinkled her nose. “Or did you eat them all?”
Yoongi’s eyes slid away from hers as he began to whistle.
“You did?” she queried incredulously. “You ate them all? Wow. I thought I was the only one who could eat through an entire box of Christmas cookies in one sitting.”
“One sitting?” he exclaimed. His eyes flew to her face as they grew wide. “You malign me! I did not eat them in one sitting! You gave them to me days ago! I ate the last one for breakfast. Just a few minutes ago,” he grumbled defensively.
“I shall have to make you some more then,” she declared dramatically.
“Shall you?” Yoongi teased her. But his eyes had grown large as saucers as he contemplated the joys of receiving another box full of his favorite tea cookies.
She bobbed her head emphatically. “But, Yoongi, what are we shopping for?”
“You’ll see,” he muttered mysteriously. “Can you be ready in an hour? I need to practice for a little while….”
“Sure!” she happily replied before turning towards the fridge. She’d gladly go shopping with her handsome roommate. But, first, breakfast.
––
“So…what are we shopping for?” she asked as Yoongi reached for her hand and pulled her towards the curb.
“Mum’s the word,” he mumbled.
“What?” she laughed. “You’re still not going to tell me?”
He shook his head. “Nope.”
When the light changed, they crossed the street. His hand was still cradling hers. She glanced down at their joined hands and sighed in contentment. She was always happy when Yoongi’s fingers were touching hers. Cheerfully, she allowed him to lead her a couple of blocks down the road. Then she followed him into a dress shop.
She glanced around in surprise. “Yoongi? What are we doing here?”
“I want you to try on some dresses.”
Her eyes speared his. “What?” she asked quizzically. “Why?”
“Just humor me. Will you?” His gorgeous, mahogany eyes were imploring her.
“All right. But, Yoongi, I really need to get back to my ornaments.”
“I know. We’ll be quick. Here. I already have some dresses picked out.”
“You…what?”
“I called ahead and asked one of the clerks to pull some out for you to try on. Let’s see if she has good taste.”
She didn’t. She had impeccable taste. Every single dress the woman had chosen fit like a glove and looked absolutely stunning on Alexis. Yoongi had his hands full keeping himself under control. Every single dress she tried on enhanced her natural beauty. For Yoongi, this was pure torture. He was fighting more of an attraction to this girl with every passing day.
But she didn’t seem to notice. She was too distracted by her reflection in the mirror. “Is that really me, Yoongi?”
Alexis peered into the glass. Her eyes slid down the white fabric of her latest choice. She didn’t like it as well as the two she already owned. But it was pretty. And it made her look like some kind of princess. Regal. Adorable.
She had never before thought of herself as adorable. She blinked. It must be the mirror. It must be oddly curved to make her look better than she actually did. Disgruntled, she headed for the changing room to try on the last dress the clerk had picked out for her. It was a deep, dark royal blue. A magnificent color for her. Which accentuated the blue of her eyes.
She discovered this truth as soon as she slipped into the long gown. She gasped and stood staring at herself in the changing room for several seconds before Yoongi’s voice floated back to her.
“Lex? Can I see the last one?”
She opened the door and stepped out, stopping short at the expression that suddenly smacked him in the face. Yoongi’s mouth fell open as his eyes widened.
“Wow,” he mumbled. “You look…amazing.” It wasn’t an adequate word, but he was so stunned by her glowing beauty that he couldn’t seem to find any words. Not really.
Her eyes looked darker now. Almost like a stormy sea instead of a bright cerulean sky. Her long tresses seemed an even richer shade of auburn. He wanted to reach out and slide his fingers through them. But mostly, he wanted to slip his arms around her and pull her close to him. And brush his lips across her plump, pink ones.
Instead, he cleared his throat. “That’s the one,” he murmured decisively.
“The one?” she questioned as she drew her copper eyebrows down over her stunning orbs.
He nodded. “Go change and bring it out.”
Confused, she turned back towards the changing room while Yoongi went to find the clerk. He paid for the dress while Alexis put her clothes back on. By the time she met him at the front of the store, he was ready to go.
She glanced at him as she stopped in front of him. “Where’s the clerk?” she asked as she looked around the store.
“Helping another customer.”
“Where should I put the dress?”
“In your closet.”
Perplexed, she frowned at him. “What?”
“Better yet, wear it to the symphony tonight.”
“What?” Her face was a study in astonishment.
“I bought it for you,” he rumbled softly. Then he turned and walked out of the shop. Hoping to avoid an argument.
She stood, rooted to the spot, for a moment as she simply stared after his retreating back. Yoongi had bought her the most beautiful dress she’d ever tried on?
But…why?
She wasn’t his wife. She wasn’t even his girlfriend. She was his…roommate. Nothing more. Right?
She glanced down at the dress in her arms.
“Can I put that in a bag for you?” a sweet voice offered from behind her.
Alexis spun around. “I, uh. Okay.” She held the dress out to the clerk and waited patiently while the woman gently folded it before sliding it into a sleek fabric bag.
The salesgirl handed Alexis the bag and thanked her for visiting the shop. Alexis, still in a daze over Yoongi’s thoughtfulness, wandered out of the boutique. She nearly bumped into Yoongi. He glanced up at her.
“Before you say anything, please remember that if it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t even want another dress. I understand not wanting to wear the same thing to the symphony every night.”
She gazed at him in shock. “How did you know that I felt self-conscious about having only two dresses to wear?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “I know you, Lex.”
She crumpled her forehead between her eyebrows. “But…how? We just met two weeks ago! How can you possibly know me that well? Am I that transparent?”
“Sometimes,” he admitted shyly.
“Yoongi,” she breathed. “It must have cost a fortune.” She glanced down at the bag in her arms.
“I make a fortune. I can afford it. And I’m the one who invited you to be my permanent guest at the symphony.”
“You are not. I offered to come applaud you every night.”
He smiled at her. “Same difference.”
“Yoongi,” she whispered again, and her husky voice sailed along his nerves making him long to pull her into his embrace.
Instead, he reached for her bag. “I’ll carry that for you.” Then he turned for home. “Come on. You’ve got some ornaments to paint.”
They walked the remainder of the distance home in silence. Each lost in their own thoughts.
Chapter 35: Something Special…or Not – December 20
Alexis spent the remainder of the day painting ornaments. Yoongi brought dinner home to save her a few minutes. They ate in a companionable silence. Then they set off for the concert hall together. Yoongi carrying her box of ornaments.
Her third night of sales was once again a raging success. Before the performance even began, she sold the hundred she’d finished in time for tonight. Then she got to spend a blissful evening listening to Yoongi’s fingers dancing upon the keys of a grand piano.
When the concert was over and Yoongi was still backstage, Alexis was brought sharply back down to earth. Frederick had attended the symphony that evening with a couple of business acquaintances, and he had spotted her on the front row. As the crowd thinned out, he made his way to her.
“Alexis!”
That voice stilled her. And chilled her. She had hoped to never see him again. She closed her eyes. Suddenly petrified. She didn’t want to face him.
But his tone was soft as he came to stand in front of her. “Alexis, darling,” he purred. With a pitch she hadn’t heard since the summer. When he’d first begun courting her. When he’d still pretended to care about her feelings. When he’d yet seen the need to woo her. “I am so glad I found you!”
Surprise moved her eyes towards his. “You are?” she asked in genuine shock. “Why?”
“Why? Because you’re my fiancé. And I love you. I’ve missed you. I…I went to your apartment. But you never answered your door. I finally tracked down your landlord, and he said you’d moved.”
She nodded dumbly. She didn’t want to have this conversation. Nervously, her eyes moved towards the curtain on the stage. Would Yoongi be coming to her rescue again tonight?
“Where are you living? You moved out so fast.”
“Because I had to,” her voice came out sharp.
He cleared his throat. “Alexis, I…I’m sorry.”
“For what?” Her tone was cold as ice.
“For becoming angry with you. I was under a lot of pressure that night. This big tech deal was about to go bust. I shouldn’t even have taken the time to meet with you that night.”
“You shouldn’t?”
But Frederick didn’t notice the strain in her voice. “No. I should have canceled. I was too stressed to give you the attention you needed…. Look, my boss asked about you the other day.”
She blinked. “He did?”
“Yes. He asked when we’re getting married.”
Ah, now this whole conversation was beginning to make sense. Frederick had only sought her out because he wanted to impress the CEO. He still didn’t care one whit about her.
“Look, Frederick, I…”
But he didn’t wait for her response. Frederick reached out and slipped his arm around her waist and tugged her close to him as his head descended and his lips claimed hers in a bland kiss. At the exact moment that Yoongi stepped out from behind the curtain. And stopped cold. As his eyes took in the little scene unfolding in front of that stage.
Yoongi felt a very sharp sword pierce his heart. It instantly deflated all his hopes. He spun on his heel and walked backstage once more. Without looking at Alexis again.
She mustered up all the strength she could and placed her hands on Frederick’s chest before shoving him as hard as she could. He fell back several feet. A look of pure astonishment lighting up his pallid face.
“Frederick, I already told you. It’s over. Just tell me where to send your ring. I’d give it back to you tonight, but I took it off two weeks ago.”
He stared at her as the expression on his countenance transformed from sickly sweet to enraged. “You little ingrate! After everything I did for you, you’re turning your back on me?! When you know that the company prefers its leaders to be family men?”
She gazed at him in stupefaction. “You expected me to marry you out of gratitude? What kind of a foundation would that be for a lasting marriage?”
“I can think of worse.”
“Frederick.”
He blinked.
“I don’t ever want to see you again. If you ever notice me in a crowd again, please stay far away from me. You and I were nothing but a mistake.” Tears were tightening her voice now.
A wave of hurt flowed over his face. “I thought you were something special. Clearly, I was wrong.” He spat the words in her face before turning and walking towards the back of the auditorium.
She dropped down into her seat and stared blankly at the wall for several minutes. His last words echoing in her head.
I thought you were something special…something special…something special. Clearly, I was wrong…wrong…wrong.
She shivered. She was growing cold as all the lies she’d grown up with overtook the lovely blooms Yoongi had planted in the garden of her heart. Darkness was encroaching.
She didn’t deserve kindness. It was quite clear. She’d never amount to anything. And she’d never win the heart of a decent man. A man like Yoongi. She didn’t deserve happiness. There was nothing extraordinary about her. She was nothing special.
She sat still for a long time as silent tears made slow tracks down her face. After a while, she reached up and wiped her face dry. And wondered what was taking Yoongi so long. She finally went in search of him. She found him conversing with the conductor. She approached them quietly.
Yoongi glanced down at her. “Are you ready to go?” he queried. But something was wrong. His voice sounded funny. Off. Flat.
She nodded. He turned back towards his friend and bid her farewell. Then he pivoted and walked right by Alexis. Without a backward glance.
She followed him outside and was dismayed when he walked home in silence. He didn’t even ask her if she’d sold all of her ornaments.
“Yoongi? What’s wrong?” she finally asked as they entered the apartment.
“Nothing. I’m just tired. I have a bit of a headache.”
She frowned in sympathy. “Can I rub your head?”
He gave her an odd look. “No. I’m going to bed.” Then he disappeared into his room and closed the door. Again, without a backward glance.
And Alexis suddenly felt very cold.
Chapter 36: Reverberations – December 21
Alexis stood in the living room and stared at that closed door for several minutes. Then, she admitted to herself that she was exhausted.
Was Yoongi upset with her? Or did he truly not feel good? Had he witnessed Frederick’s kiss?
Surely not. He’d been backstage talking to his friends. But if he didn’t see Frederick kissing her, then why was he so quiet tonight?
Maybe he really was just fighting a headache.
Now she was too. With a heavy heart, she headed for bed. Where she would end up tossing and turning all night long. And shedding a few tears too.
––
When she awoke the next morning, she found herself alone in the apartment. Yoongi had left her a note. Claiming to have a practice to attend. But she couldn’t remember him speaking of such a practice before. Was he avoiding her?
She set to work painting ornaments and pressed on until well past noon. She hadn’t even realized that she’d missed lunch until she received a text message from Yoongi. Stating that he was going to grab a bite to eat with some of the other musicians. Then he had some errands to run. He’d be gone all afternoon.
Now she was sure that he was avoiding her. Her heart sank all the way down to the first floor of their building. What exactly was wrong?
As she skipped lunch – who could possibly be hungry under these circumstances? – and continued to paint pieces of thinly cut wood, she pondered the situation. Yoongi must have seen Frederick kiss her. Was he upset because of that? But…why?
He barely knew her. And, although he had made a few comments initially that seemed to indicate he was attracted to her, he had quickly backed away from any behavior that would suggest he felt anything other than friendship for her.
Yoongi couldn’t be in love with her. After all, she was nothing special. And she was going to be a mother soon. But maybe – if he’d witnessed that kiss – he was having second thoughts about moving her in with him. He had given up his freedom and half his apartment to her. Having her sharing his space must be inconvenient for him.
Perhaps, she’d best hide in her room. Give him some space. Let him enjoy his apartment again. Without her filling it with her stuff.
She glanced around the living room and kitchen. Her ornaments were spread out on every surface. She sighed. And began to transfer them to her bedroom.
She cleaned up the common spaces in the apartment before retiring to her room. Where she worked diligently on her creations all afternoon. In between crying spells. She wasn’t doing very well with this turn of events.
Frederick’s unkind words kept reverberating in her spirit. So did Yoongi’s indifference of last night.
Why was she surprised that Yoongi had pulled away from her? This was what happened every time she got close to a man. He ended up losing interest in her. Whether it was just in a friendship with her or a romance. Every time, his ardor cooled, and she was left alone again.
Her stepfather had been right.
“You’re just like your mother. You’ll never be able to hold on to a man. You’ll flit from one to another. Never satisfying any of them. You’ll end up bitter and alone.”
He’d spoken those words that fateful day. After he’d slapped her across the cheek.
The marks of his fingers hadn’t faded for two whole days. She’d had to skip class the first day. It had been a Friday. Her friends had thought she was just playing hooky. But she really wasn’t that kind of person. However, she hadn’t been about to disabuse them of their belief. No one had ever known how her stepfather had treated her. She’d made sure of it.
“You’re just like your mother.”
Life was ironic. History was repeating itself. Only this time, it was Alexis who was pregnant with an unwanted child. Frederick would never want this baby. He would consider their baby to be nothing special. Just like her.
Alexis set her paintbrush down and headed for the bathroom to shower. She was sobbing even before she turned on the water.
––
Yoongi entered his apartment to disturb…silence. Nothing was moving. But as he closed the outer door, he realized that wasn’t true. He could hear water running. He moved towards his bedroom.
Yep. Alexis was showering.
He frowned. He was wondering when she was going to tell him the truth. He was frozen. He was terrified that Alexis was going to leave him. That she was planning to move back in with Frederick.
Yoongi had given her ample opportunity on the walk home last night to tell him what had happened. But she had remained silent. Like she didn’t want him to know. Most likely, because she planned to return to her fiancé yet didn’t know how to tell Yoongi.
He sighed. And closed his eyes. All the moments he and Alexis had shared over the past two weeks must not have meant as much to her as they had to him. Of course, she’d choose to return to a man she’d known for six months. She hadn’t been acquainted with Yoongi for even three weeks yet. How could he possibly compete with a man she’d once pledged her future to? A man she’d slept with? The man who’d fathered her child?
Yoongi growled. That man didn’t deserve her. He didn’t treat her right. He had been horrible to her. She couldn’t go back to him. She just couldn’t.
But Yoongi knew that she might. He had seen too many abused girls return to their abusers. He winced as he envisioned the life Alexis would inevitably end up living if she went back to Frederick. How could Yoongi convince her to stay with him?
He’d been able to push his feelings to the edges of his mind for sixteen whole days. Until last night. When the very real possibility that he was actually losing her was suddenly thrust upon him. He was forced to face both his feelings and her potential desertion head-on. And he realized that his heart was breaking clean in half. At the thought of losing her.
It had all become crystal clear in that moment.
He was in love with Lex.
