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As Lucia sat there with him, she realized something.  Yoongi wasn’t as put together as he seemed.  He had many unresolved questions.  His heart had suffered a lot of damage, and it had begun to heal slightly.  Yet there were so many wounds that remained still untouched.  Some of them were festering under Band-Aids.  There was pain still fresh in his gaze.  Her heart wept.  She had hoped he would be able to give her some of the answers she was seeking.  But now, she found herself with only more questions…

“Have you found anything that has made you truly happy?” 

His question caught her off guard.  She wanted to say yes.  That, of course, she had found her reason for being.  That she had discovered the salve to all her pain.  But it wasn’t true.  She didn’t have any of the answers Yoongi lacked.  

She’d learned how to control her responses.  She’d discovered how to analyze her thinking patterns.  She’d found outlets for her agony.  Ways to deal with her inner turmoil.  But with all her efforts, one thing remained untouched…her heart.

It was the part of her she could never quite control.  For her heart continued to long for something she had no words for.  Her heart was always searching for something.  She’d find herself studying a new face.  She’d notice she was probing a new voice.  Hunting…always on the lookout for something indiscernible.  But…what was it?  What was she looking for?  What was Yoongi also seeking after?  Would they ever find it?

She stared at him.  She was at a loss for words.  He was making her confront questions she’d rather leave alone.  Things she’d pushed to the back of her mind a long time ago.  Things she’d buried beneath dark waters.  Things she’d rather not disturb…

Had she ever found anything that had made her truly happy?  She couldn’t even remember what true happiness felt like.  Had she ever known?

She caught his gaze again and shook her head.  Then she asked him another question, the one now burning in her heart, “So…you’re still looking for something?”

Sadness still clinging to the depths of his gaze, Yoongi met her eyes.  Then he nodded.

“But you don’t know what it is?”

He shook his head.  Then he spoke.  “But I’ll know it when I see it.”

So will I.  

She knew he was right.  

“You’ll keep looking, then?”

He nodded and sipped his coffee.  His beautiful, sad eyes met hers one more time.

So will I then, my friend.  So will I.