Blog

Chapter 9: First Kiss? – January 2, 2021

Seonghan waited an entire week before he attempted to kiss her.  Yunseong languished all week long.  Every night she saw him, she waited with great expectation for him to kiss her.  And each time, she was disappointed.

On their first date, he had been completely charming, amusing her with one funny story after another all night long.  It seemed that being a model supplied him with an endless stream of amusing anecdotes to share.  She’d spent a good portion of the evening giggling.  And the remainder smiling.  She couldn’t remember the last time she’d enjoyed herself so much.

Especially not with Tae.  

She had shoved that traitorous thought down deep.  Tae was buried in yesterday.  And she didn’t revisit yesterday.  She never had.

Tae hadn’t even texted her to see if she wanted to play MIRᴙOR.  In fact, she never ran into him when she was playing online anymore either.  He had simply faded from her life the night of the wedding.  A tiny part of her felt pierced through at this knowledge.  But she ruthlessly shoved it inside that box hidden in the black hole too.

—

She had been surprised that Seonghan hadn’t wanted to get together with her on New Year’s Eve, but he’d claimed he had a work function that night.  So they had planned a date for two days later, the Saturday night exactly a week after their first date.

She’d seen him exactly four times.  The night of the wedding reception.  Saturday evening.  He’d stopped by Sunday to take her to lunch.  And Wednesday he had taken her to dinner again.  

The man seemed to enjoy feeding her.  Which was all right with her.  She loved eating.  Almost as much as Jungkook!

But tonight, they were going to a movie after dinner too.  Again, she’d spent a long time staring at her closet.  Completely dissatisfied with her clothing collection.  She’d finally decided on a dress with sleeves.  She’d been so cold on their first date in her sleeveless dress that she’d ruined the effect by wearing her coat throughout most of their date.  

Now she slid into a green dress that drew attention to her eyes.  It was form-fitting above the waist and had sleeves that belled out.  Below the waist, it fell in cute folds nearly to her knees.  At least this time, Yuni didn’t rebuke her.  She simply lay on her bed watching her as she rifled through her closet looking for her navy scarf.

“Please, Yun.  Just be careful.  He’s eight years older than you are.  He’s probably a lot more experienced.”

“I am well aware,” she mumbled gratingly.

“Does that not bother you?”

She shrugged.  “Why should it?  Presumably, if he is, he’ll know what he’s doing.  He can make me happy.”

Yunyeong just gaped at her.  She knew from her own experience that such a supposition was just not true.  Experience did not equate to gentleness.  Or selflessness.  Or adoration.  Or pleasure.

Yunyeong felt tears flooding her eyes.  “Please, Yun.  I know you’re irritated with me.  I…I just don’t want to see you hurt the way I was,” she whispered breathlessly.

Yunseong stilled.  She took a deep breath and turned towards her sister.  She smiled at Yuni as her eyes released a pang for the memory her sister was reliving right now. 

“Yuni.  I know you love me.  But I’m a big girl.  So are you.  You wouldn’t make at twenty the error in judgement you made at sixteen.  And I…I’m ready for things you weren’t ready for then.”

Yunyeong stared at her.  Her mouth fell open.  She felt as if her sister had just slapped her.  She sat straight up and flew off the bed to stand next to it as she balled her fists.

“Well, maybe if I’d been twenty when he tried to rape me, I would have changed my mind and delighted in his touch!” 

She threw those words on a sob at her twin before fleeing from her room.  Yunyeong ran smack into Jungkook in the hall.  Jungkook, who had heard both of the girls’ last comments as well as the sob that had escaped Yunyeong’s lips, slid his arms around her and pulled her close.  He felt anger rising in his soul.  He’d had about enough of Yunseong’s rebellious spirit.  

Suddenly, it appeared in the doorway before him.  He glared at her chagrinned countenance.  

“Just because Tae broke your heart doesn’t give you the right to stomp all over your sister’s.  She loves you and is just trying to watch out for you.”  He was so angry now that he was seething.  He was afraid if he kept speaking, he would say something he would come to regret.  

But the words spilled out anyway.  “If you want to go hurt yourself with that guy, then go right ahead.  But leave your sweet sister out of it.”  

He took a deep breath and plunged onward.  “I think you’re trying to hurt Tae.  But right now, he’s oblivious.  He gets that way sometimes.  Locked in his own world, in his own thoughts.  But that’s not a reason to beat the rest of us up.  Go confront him if you have a problem.  Don’t take it out on Yuni.”  

He bent his head then and kissed Yunyeong on the top of her head while his hand rubbed her back gently.  But it was the tender expression on his countenance that would continue to haunt Yunseong.  Long after this whole season of her life was over.

—

Dinner had been lovely.  Except that she’d continued to hear Jungkook’s voice berating her.  So she’d laughed less often.  Seonghan had noticed.

“What’s wrong?” he asked her finally after an hour of her tepid responses.

Her head shot up, and her eyes careened into his.  “Nothing!”

A smile curved his lips.  “That is not true.  Something is bothering you.”

She heaved a deep sigh.  “I got into an argument with my sister.”  She was going to leave it at that.

“About what?” he prodded gently.

She found herself speaking the truth.  “You.”

“Ah,” he nodded knowingly. “She doesn’t like me.  She’s afraid I’m going to deflower you, eh?”

She narrowed her eyes at him.  “What makes you think I need deflowering?”

He chuckled then.  Which stung.  

Miffed, she sat up straighter.  And glared at him.

“Oh, please, darling.  You can’t fool me.  I can tell when a girl finds my touch stimulating.  And isn’t familiar with a man touching her that way.”  

His voice was a velvety purr.  But she took exception to his words.

She just stared at him.  And felt like she was about to fall off a precipice.  “B-but you’ve never really touched me.  I mean, we’ve held hands.  And you breathed on my neck once.  But…”

He reached across the table and rested the palm of his hand on top of hers.  Then his thumb began to stroke the edge of her thumb.  He seemed to know – and relish the fact – that his touch was invading her being with lightning bolts.  Then he picked his hand up and turned hers over, palm up.  With his fingertips, he stroked the entire length of her hand, beginning at the bottom of her palm and sliding all the way up to the tips of her fingers.  She shivered mightily.  Her response didn’t escape his notice.

“Like I said,” he murmured.

She was panting.  Her stomach was tied in knots now.  She felt like fleeing.  Or falling into a bed with him.  He was completely fascinating.  As was his touch.  And that was what scared her.  He was so much more enticing than she had anticipated that first night.  

He was…irresistible.  Even knowing that he was quite experienced with women.  She wondered briefly how many he’d shared a bed with.  But then the brush of his thumb across the center of her palm distracted her from her musing.

—

After dinner, he helped her into her coat.  He bent and inhaled her perfume.  

“Lily of the valley,” he murmured.

She turned suddenly to smile up at him.  “How did you know that?”

He shrugged.  “My eomma used to grow them in our front yard.  I grew up in the country.”

“Did you, really?” she asked, astonished.

“Mmhmm.”  His eyes were invading hers again.  She felt her stomach doing more somersaults.

He slid his arm around her waist and pulled her towards his car.

—

After the movie ended, he escorted her to his vehicle.  And opened her door for her.  A few moments later, after he slid into his seat, he turned to gaze at her.

“Wanna come back to my apartment for a while?”

A bell sounded in her heart.  She decided to listen to it tonight.

She shook her head.  He chewed on his lip as his eyes traced hers.  

“I don’t want to leave you yet.  Wanna go somewhere?”

“Where?” She didn’t want to be without him either.

“There’s a hill that overlooks Busan.  It’s beautiful this time of night.”

I bet it is.

She just blinked at him.  “Okay,” she finally responded in a tiny voice.  As she wondered what kind of trouble she’d just gotten herself into.

—

He pulled to the side of the lane that crowned the city.  She sat staring down at all the lights shining in the darkness.  There were so many that they had pushed the darkness far back from the center of Busan.

“So beautiful,” she whispered.

“Yes,” came his deep purr, “you are.”

She glanced at him then.  He was looking at her in a way that made her just a little uncomfortable.  Even here in the dark.  Where she couldn’t see him perfectly well.

“Wanna step out of the car and take a look?”

She was surprised by his question.  She nodded her head.  And opened her own door a fraction.  He reached for her hand.  “Wait.  I’ll open it for you.”

He was, unfailingly, a gentleman in that area at least.  

So she waited.

A few seconds later, he opened her door and reached for her hand.  He drew her up out of his car and towards the grassy knoll.  They stood a few feet outside of the lane and stared down at the city.  

It was freezing out here tonight.  She shivered.  And he wrapped his arm around her and drew her close.  They’d shared hours of conversation this week.  And a lot of laughs.  She was comfortable in his company.  

Except for one thing.  Something about him set her on edge.  But it was an exciting edge.  One she felt beckoned toward.  It felt especially sharp right now.

She glanced up at him as another shiver rocked her body.  He let go of her and unzipped his coat.  He shrugged out of it and held it up behind her.

“Here.  You’re cold.  Wear my coat.”

She gazed up at him.  “I don’t want you to get cold.”

As he drew his coat around her, he pulled her closer to him and bent his head so that his breath grazed her lips.  “You can warm me up.”

She stopped breathing as their eyes touched.  Then his gaze settled on her lips.  And a moment later, his face was descending towards hers.  Then came the gentle brush of his lips against her own.  Her eyes fluttered shut as she felt her heart ascending.  His kiss was indescribably sweet.  The tender touch of his lips against her own was undoing her.

But then, after a few moving moments, he deepened that kiss.  And her stomach tumbled about as his arms slid between her coat and her dress.  His hands on her back drew her even nearer until she was pressed completely up against him.  His mouth ravaged hers.  Sending a heat wave to spiral upward and outward from her core.

This was definitely not his first kiss.  Or his seventh.  Or even his hundredth.  If she had had any question about the depth into which she was diving when she’d agreed to go out with him, all her illusions were completely obliterated as he opened her mouth with his.