She found him waiting for her the next evening. She approached him from behind. He was sitting quietly, staring down into the stream. Seated on her bench.
She felt her anger growing. How dare he invade her private sanctum?
This was the one safe place she had in all the world. Her haven that belonged to her alone. She had discovered this hidden corner of the garden as a child and fallen instantly in love with its serenity. The gently flowing stream that carried the lotus blooms downhill. The sweet breezes that often teased the leaves of the cherry blossom trees. The honeyed air that made her heart emit bursts of contentment. She had found such solace only here.
And now he had ruined it. With his imposing presence.
She would have fled before he could acknowledge her existence in this lovely garden, but as she turned to go, her foot snapped a twig lying on the ground just a few feet from him. He spun around, a look of such expectancy on his countenance that she felt her breath instantly evaporate.
What was it?
It was the expression in his eyes. Delight at seeing her. Joy in her presence. Had anyone ever looked at her like that before?
She couldn’t explain it. It made no sense. She wasn’t loveable. She knew that now. Seon Woo had rejected her. Oh, he had told her she was a good woman who deserved a man with the same heart as her own. But she knew it was a lie.
She wasn’t a good woman.
A good woman wouldn’t have attempted to kill Ah Ro. A good woman would have found another solution to her mother’s dilemma. Sook Myeong could never be considered a good woman.
Jong Su watched as something painful trembled across her countenance.
“What is it?” he breathed again. Just like yesterday.
She seemed to instantly snap out of her reverie. “The same answer I gave you yesterday. It’s you! Cluttering up my garden again. Invading my private space. My one refuge in all the world. And you’ve destroyed it!”
She turned to flee, but he was upon her in an instant. His long, strong fingers reaching out to grab her wrist as she attempted to run back to the palace.
As those warm fingers closed about her arm, she allowed her eyes to flutter shut. Was she always to be trapped within this man’s grasp? Powerless before him? Imprisoned in his fascination with her – or with her kingdom, more like.
She tugged violently against that grasp. She wasn’t going down without a fight.
Exasperated, he fought against her struggle. Dragging her up against him. Before she could react, he dropped her wrist to slide his arms around her and cage her up against his chest.
“Stop it!” he rebuked her sharply. But then his voice – as well as his countenance – softened. “Relax. I’m not here to force you.”
“Oh, really?” she thundered, sneering at him as her eyes slid down their locked bodies. “You think I would choose this position, do you?”
Quietly, he murmured, “I fervently hope that someday you will.”
His soft words silenced her. And an odd expression flitted across her face. Her eyes grew round suddenly. And something akin to fear slid across her countenance.
“I have no wish to hurt you. Nor to imprison you. I simply want to get to know you. That’s why I invaded your private sanctum tonight.
“Will you…please…just sit with me on the bench? We don’t even have to talk tonight if you don’t want to. Just…sit with me. Breathe the air with me. Watch the death of the sun with me. And the rise of the stars. And promise to meet me here again tomorrow night.”
His words were doing strange things to her heart. She closed her eyes against him. That was the only defense left to her.
And she was instantly aware of the rapid beat of his heart. And the matching rhythm of his breathing. And the warmth of his arms wrapped tightly about her. Its certain heat erupting from the center of his body. Pressed so tightly up against hers. She felt her own pulse quicken. As it seemed to whisk her breath away.
“Please,” he begged. “Don’t hide from me.”
Those sweet words, kindly spoken, unsealed her eyes. Against her will. But her heart seemed to have the upper hand tonight. And he was appealing to that unsteady organ. That was her only explanation for what came next.
She nodded her head. Nearly imperceptibly. But they both recognized it for the agreement that it was. She was rewarded instantly as a beautiful smile suddenly crowned his face in delight. And she nearly gasped as she realized once again that he was quite handsome when he smiled. The corners of his eyes crinkled becomingly.
And a surprising dimple popped out in his right cheek. Making him seem like a tiny boy. She could just picture his mother ruffling his hair and patting him on the head before telling him to run along and play. Though, really, all she wanted was to pull her adorable son up into her arms and swing him around.
Unaccountably, Sook Myeong felt tears biting her eyes. She closed them again against that unwelcome sting.
“It’s all right,” he whispered.
Her eyes flew open, and he saw the tears shining in them. And had to acknowledge that he was taking ground. She was not indifferent to him. He had touched some hidden corner of her heart. And disturbed some pain there. He wished to wipe it all away. But…how to do that?
Tread carefully. Go lightly, Jong Su. This girl has been devastated by something. Or someone. Or a whole host of someones.
“It will never be all right,” she gasped. Then she shocked him by burying her face over his heart.
And he realized that he was already giving her what she really needed. A mighty hug. And reassurance.
It’s just that she was so broken that she couldn’t receive it.
He would just have to show up here every night. And sit quietly next to her. Maybe…holding her hand. Until she realized that he wasn’t going anywhere. And that that was a good thing.
I mean, that is all a damaged soul needs… Someone stable to be present