This story is dedicated to you if you have ever been abused by someone bigger, stronger, and seemingly more powerful than you. You are not alone. You are infinitely precious. And the trauma you endured is not your fault. Know that you are so loved. And whatever trauma you have been through – it does NOT define you. You are a beautiful rose, a lovely lily, a most precious gem.
Rated M for Mature. This story deals with some difficult topics and involves some graphic situations.
She sat down to watch Yoongi’s VLIVE. The rumor was that he was going to play a new song that he had written in response to two letters he had received. She couldn’t miss this. She’d told her boyfriend she was sick. There was no way she was missing Yoongi’s song.
Of course, it wasn’t a response to her two letters. That was just a coincidence. Still, she had to see it. She had to hear his song. Somehow, she was certain it would feed her some hope. She really needed some hope today.
She rubbed her arm. Where a new bruise was forming. He’d squeezed her arm until she’d thought it would break last night. She’d cried herself to sleep again. She had to find a way to break free from him. But how?
She turned on her computer and waited. Eventually, she was seated there in front of Yoongi. She began to screen record him. Of course, he couldn’t see her. But she could see him. She could hear him too. The first thing that shocked her was that he spoke in English. No Korean. Was he speaking to her? Usually when doing a VLIVE, Yoongi spoke exclusively – or nearly so – in Korean. Why the difference tonight?
She couldn’t just hear him; she could understand him. Every single word he said. So when he began to play the most haunting melody she’d ever heard, she was already undone. Then a few moments later, the lyrics – once again, ALL IN ENGLISH! – filled her ears with hope and her heart with wonder. Yoongi had read her letters! She was absolutely sure of it! And he had figured out a way to communicate with her! Even though she’d left her name and address off of her letters.
He was singing straight to her.
“I don’t know you, but I know your heart.
I can’t reach you, but I’ve felt your darts.
I can’t see you, but I hear your wounds echoing in my head.
They are there, in every word you ever said.
I can’t help you, but I want to right your every wrong.
So I’m praying that it won’t be long
Till you are free of his touch.
I think I could love you so much.”
She tasted the salty tang of her own tears. Yoongi wanted to right her wrongs. He was praying she’d find a way out. He was sending his love to her. Then his chorus overwhelmed her.
“Run to me, run to me – When you need a true friend.
Come to me, come to me – Till the very blue end.
Run to me, run to me – Tell me all your secrets.
Come to me, come to me – Just be brave to speak it.”
He was telling her he would be her safe place. He wanted to help her. She knew she hadn’t signed her letters or given him her address. He’d had no way to respond or come to her rescue. Yet…he had found a way to reach her. With his music. He was urging her, “Run to me. Come to me.” He wanted to help her! She truly wasn’t alone anymore!
Then he began to rap to her in his dark voice.
“Please tell me your name.
Just show me your face.
I promise to be the same.
To still be your secret place.
Come on – won’t you send me your address?
Wanna see you free from this mad mess.
Love, please, don’t give in to his anger.
Wanna see you free from this danger.”
She began to sob. He was begging her to write to him again. And this time, to sign her name. He wanted her address too. He sounded like he wanted to meet her. “Show me your face.” He wanted to see her. He truly wanted to help her. YOONGI wanted to help HER! She could hardly believe it. She wasn’t imagining it, was she, because she wanted it to be true so badly?
She shook her head. His song matched her letters too well. And he had announced that it was in response to two letters someone had written to him. And the whole VLIVE was in ENGLISH! A South Korean man was speaking exclusively in English for her!! To reach out and touch her. He was promising to still be her shelter from the storm even after she’d revealed her identity to him. Had he called her “love”?
“Come to me, come to me – My door’s always open.
Run to me, run to me – In the great wide open.
Come to me, come to me – I’ll be your safe harbor.
Run to me, run to me – Be your blooming arbor,
I’ll be your scent of spring – After the end of everything.”
He was telling her that there was hope for tomorrow. That she could end things with her boyfriend, and a new season would begin. A new day of freedom would arise. Yoongi would be there for her. He would be her friend. He would be her safe place. He was the promise of a new beginning for her.
He began to sing the second verse then as he played his keyboard. Its melody wrapped around her heart with such comfort. Freeing tears flowed down her face once more.
“I don’t know you, but I know your mind.
I can’t reach you, but I think I’ll try.
I can’t see you, but I know that you are walking on eggshells,
Searching for some peace, no answer in sight.
I can’t help you, but I know that you are walking through hell,
So I’m praying that you find some might
To free yourself from his touch.
I think I already love you so much.”
Those lines put all her doubts to rest. He had just directly quoted two lines from her letter! Walking on eggshells! Walking through hell. Yoongi was truly speaking to her! And he had just told her that he loved her. He was wrapping her up in the comforting strands of his love for her. He wanted to see her free. Someone wanted to see her free.
“Run to me, run to me – When you need a true friend.
Come to me, come to me – Till the very blue end.
Run to me, run to me – Tell me all your secrets.
Come to me, come to me – Just be brave to speak it.
“Please tell me your name.
Just show me your face.
I promise to be the same.
To still be your secret place.
Come on – won’t you send me your address?
Wanna see you free from this mad mess.
Love, please, don’t give in to his anger.
Wanna see you free from this danger.
“Come to me, come to me – My door’s always open.
Run to me, run to me – In the great wide open.
Come to me, come to me – I’ll be your safe harbor.
Run to me, run to me – Be your blooming arbor,
I’ll be your scent of spring – After the end of everything.”
He was telling her that there was a place of freedom awaiting her. Where she could breathe again. Freely. Yoongi was vowing to be her safe place. Her new beginning. Now all she had to do was find the courage to tell him who she was. Was she willing to unveil herself to her bias?
