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Chapter 4: A Strong Shoulder – June 10, 2019

Yoongi sat, simply staring at the drink in his hand.  It wasn’t wine.  He’d given up his habit for Nari and never looked back.  Now he spoke to his best friend.

“So…you like my sister?  How did I not see this coming?”  He stared in disbelief at his friend.  “So for you, it’s real.  It’s not an arranged marriage on your part, is it?”  He winced as he met Namjoon’s gaze and saw him nod.  “You know she’s in love with Tae, right?”

Namjoon let out a deep sigh. “I figured as much.  The way they look at each other.  It’s so…adoring. 

Teasing.  You can see sparks in their eyes…”  His voice trailed off sadly.

Yoongi sighed. “They’ll get over it, I suppose.  You all will.”  He took a big gulp from the glass in his hand before making a sour face.  “What is this?”

Namjoon shrugged. “I asked for something strong for the both of us.  I figured we’d need it.”

Yoongi cringed and put the glass down.  “Namjoon!  You know I don’t drink anymore!  What were you thinking?  Have you absolutely lost your mind over my sister?” 

“What am I supposed to do, Yoongi?”

After a thoughtful moment, he responded, “I think you need to consider your options.  And find out if Tae loves Eunji too.”

“I figured you’d say that.”  Namjoon’s gaze pierced his.  “And if he does?  What then?”

Yoongi tapped the table. “I can’t tell you that, my friend.  That’s completely between you, Tae, and Eunji.  But if you need to take your mind off of things, you could babysit Jungju for us.  That would give you something to do.  Nari and I haven’t been out together alone in some time.  Not since you started prepping for finals.”

A sad smile curved Namjoon’s lips.  “You know I adore your son, Yoongi.  But even he can’t heal a broken heart.”

Yoongi glanced down at his drink and almost wished he could drown the sorrow he felt for his friend in it.  That was how much he understood Namjoon’s pain.

—

“Eunji!  I need to leave Jungju with you again today.  Do you mind?  I think we’ll be gone most of the day,” Yoongi yelled, pounding on her bedroom door. 

She’d been asleep before he’d returned home from his meeting with Namjoon the night before.  He’d never gotten the chance to ask her to babysit today.

“That’s fine,” she called through the door.  “Just let me get dressed first.”

“He’s still sleeping, Eunji, so there’s no hurry.  Stay in your pajamas if you like.”

“What time do you think you’ll be back?” she asked as she opened the door.

“Um…I’m not exactly sure.  It could be any time between six and nine.  It just depends on how all the talks go.  And whether we do a business dinner tonight.  Do you think you can put him to bed if we’re not back by eight?”

“Yep.  I can handle it.  I’ve done it before.”

“All right, I gotta run.  See you tonight.”

“See you.”

“Thanks, Eunji,” he mumbled in his deep purr before he headed down the stairs and out the front door.

—

“Jungju, why don’t you want to go play?” Eunji looked down at the small boy cradled in her arms.

“I tired…”

“You just woke up a couple hours ago!”  And he had slept until nearly eleven o’clock.

Jungju leaned his head on her shoulder.

“Are you sick?”  She placed her hand on his forehead.  “Oh, no.  You have a fever.”

She quickly pulled out her phone, attempting to call Tae.  When he didn’t answer, she tried again.  Still no answer.  Maybe his phone was dead.  She tried his home phone.

“Hello?” a gentle voice greeted her.

“Namjoon…?  Where’s Tae?”

Namjoon felt like staring in disbelief at his phone.  Eunji, his fiancé, was calling his house, but she didn’t want to speak to him.  She was looking for his little brother.  It irked him; it hurt him.  Why wasn’t he good enough for her?

“Um, I don’t know.  He left an hour ago.  Do you need something?”

“Yeah, I was going to ask him to go get some medicine for Jungju.  He’s sick.”

“Oh.” 

He should feel better, right?  No.  She needed help, and she was still programmed to call her best friend.  Not her fiancé.  Namjoon sighed inwardly as he felt more of his hope slipping away.  Still, he came to her rescue.

“I can do it.  What do you need?”

“Fever reducers.”

“All right, I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Thank you, Namjoon.”

“No problem.”

She hung up and put her phone in her pocket.  She then took Jungju upstairs to his bedroom.

Namjoon arrived a quarter of an hour later, and the guard let him inside.

“Eunji!  I’m here!” he called from the foyer.  His voice rang throughout the huge room to bounce off the tall ceiling.

“Hang on!  I’ll be down in a second!” she yelled from somewhere upstairs.

A minute later, Eunji descended the staircase, holding Jungju in her arms.  She addressed Namjoon in a relieved voice.

“Thanks for bringing the medicine.  I didn’t want to take Jungju out, and I gave my maid the day off.  I was thinking about calling Yoongi or Nari…but I didn’t want to bother them in the middle of a crucial business meeting.  I know Yoongi usually wants to do all he can to support Nari when she’s meeting with the bigwigs.  And Appa still expects him to attend every meeting he can.  Just to keep him well-informed.”

“Ah.  It’s no big deal.  I’m glad to help.  I haven’t started working for Appa yet.  I’m still settling in.”  He crossed the room to them and glanced down at the flushed, little boy.  He smiled at Jungju and ruffled his hair.  “Hey, buddy, I bought you some soup.  Would you like some?”

“Unca Juju.  Don’t feel good,” whimpered the tiny tot.  

“Aww, I’m sorry, buddy.  I brought you some medicine to help you feel better.  Wanna take some?”

The little boy just blinked up at him.

Eunji smiled. “You’re so sweet, Namjoon.  Thank you.  Let’s go out to the living room.”

A moment later, she set Jungju down on the couch and took the medicine from Namjoon.  After several unsuccessful attempts to get Jungju to drink the frothy, pink, medicinal liquid, Namjoon finally persuaded him to take it by promising him a lollipop.  The little boy was now sitting on Eunji’s lap holding the wrapped sucker in his hand. 

“Jungju, do you want to eat your lollipop?” Eunji asked him as she gazed down at him with a sweet smile on her face. 

The little boy shook his head and closed his eyes as he leaned his forehead against her chest.  “No.”

“Jungju, will you please drink some soup?”  Namjoon asked him. 

“No.  Don’t want soup,” the tiny boy whined.

“I know, but you need to drink something.”  Namjoon’s face lit up.  “How about some juice?”

“Nana milk,” the little boy begged.

“You want some banana milk?” Eunji asked, with hope in her voice.

A definitive nod from a small head.

She glanced up at Namjoon.  “Can you please get him a carton?  There’s some in the fridge.”

He returned a few moments later and coaxed Jungju to drink a little bit.  Namjoon sat down next to them.  He met Eunji’s eye.

“Can I hold him?”

Relief evident in her voice, she exclaimed softly, “Oh!  Would you?  I need to use the bathroom.” 

Gratefully, she deposited her happy burden into Namjoon’s lap and headed out of the room after assuring her nephew that she would be right back.  By the time she returned, Jungju was sound asleep, curled up against Namjoon.  Inside the doorway, she stood staring down at them for a moment before Namjoon realized she’d come back into the room.  He was gazing at the little boy with such an adoring expression on his face.  Namjoon appeared almost…vulnerable.  Then she saw a tear slide down his cheek.  She stared in shock at that wet path.

Namjoon had always been a mystery to her.  Brilliant.  Quiet.  Sweet.  But, mostly, speechless.  Whereas Tae would talk with her for hours – and had talked with her for hours.  Days, even.  But Namjoon never spoke much in her presence.  She’d always wondered why. 

She’d overhead numerous conversations between him and her brother over the years.  Namjoon always had plenty to say to his best friend.  But not to her.  She’d interrupted her fair share of conversations between Namjoon and Tae too.  In those instances – of which there were many over the years – Namjoon had, most often, led those conversations.  So why was he so silent around her?

She watched as he reached up and wiped the tears from his face.  Suddenly, his eyes collided with hers.  She gasped as something sparked between them.  Then, she was distracted from that feeling by the obvious embarrassment that flooded his face.  He glanced away from her before his eyes found her nephew’s countenance again. 

“He’s asleep,” Namjoon whispered the obvious.  Completely at a loss for any other words.  She always robbed him of breath.

“Good.  Hopefully, he’ll take a long nap and wake up feeling better.”

She walked towards the couch.  Uncertain what to do now.

Namjoon looked up at her.  “Wanna watch a movie while he sleeps?”

“Sure.”  Her eyes lit up with relief.  “Um.  Are you hungry?  Should I make some microwave popcorn?”

He nodded.  “I’d never turn down microwave popcorn.”

After a few minutes, Eunji returned with a tray full of snacks and drinks.  She deposited her burden on the coffee table and grabbed the remote to find them a movie.  They sat in a companionable silence munching on their snacks while watching a compelling drama. 

It wasn’t long before Jungju was releasing soft snores against Namjoon’s chest.  He shifted the little boy slightly, and his breathing deepened and evened out.  Eunji glanced from Jungju to Namjoon then.  Their eyes touched, and they both smiled at each other before returning their attention to the television screen.

But they were both still quite conscious of the other.  Eunji had sat down next to him, and the outsides of their thighs were now touching.  Which was very distracting to them both.  Occasionally, their elbows would bump into each other too.  No matter how she tried to focus on the screen in front of her eyes, she couldn’t escape a deep awareness of the man sitting next to her.  She could even hear his breathing.  For some reason, her curiosity concerning him had been piqued simply by his quiet presence in this room with her.

Namjoon kept holding his breath.  He didn’t mean to.  It’s just that he wasn’t used to being this near to her.  It was making his heart do odd things.  He slid a surreptitious glance her way during the middle of the movie.  His eyes traced her beautiful profile.  And he sighed.  Then his gaze clung to her lips for a few moments.  Until she suddenly turned to look at him.  Embarrassed, he smiled at her before dropping his gaze to the little boy on his lap.  He waited a few seconds before returning his attention to the television set.  But even the gripping drama playing on the screen couldn’t rob him of his awareness of the beautiful woman seated next to him on the couch.

As the movie came to an end, Eunji glanced at the clock, wondering how soon Yoongi would be home.  It was only two forty-two.  It would be hours before Jungju’s parents returned to comfort him.

“It’s raining outside.”

Namjoon’s voice broke the quiet that had invaded the room when she’d muted the television during the movie credits.  He motioned to the window.  Eunji’s eyes followed that gesturing hand.  Rain was pouring down in steady streams. Quiet, straight rivulets falling directly from heaven to earth.  Drenching everything.  They almost looked like a succession of translucent bullets speeding down from the sky into the earth.  But they were carriers of peace not destruction.  This was her favorite kind of rain.

Namjoon’s voice sounded softly.  “‘The quality of mercy is not strained.  It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven upon the place beneath.  It is twice blessed: it blesses him that gives and him that takes.’”

“Shakespeare,” Eunji breathed in wonder.  She turned to stare in awe at Namjoon.  “The Merchant of Venice.  That is my absolute favorite Shakespearean quote of all time.”

“Is it really?” he glanced in surprise at her.  “It’s mine too.”

She nodded her head and continued the quotation.  “‘‘Tis mightiest in the mightiest.  It becomes the thronèd monarch better than his crown.  His scepter shows the force of temporal power, the attribute to awe and majesty wherein doth sit the dread and fear of kings, but mercy is above this sceptered sway.  It is enthronéd in the hearts of kings.  It is an attribute to God himself.  And earthly power doth then show likest God’s…’”

“‘…when mercy seasons justice.’”  Namjoon completed her thought.

They beamed at one another.

“So beautiful,” Eunji murmured, trapped in his gaze.

Yes, you are.

His eyes delved deeply into hers for a few moments.  Finally, her gaze strayed from his as she turned her head to look out the window again at the falling rain.  But his eyes remained trained on her face.  They slid along its lovely planes and investigated its hills and valleys.  Its crooks and crannies. 

He had always found Eunji beautiful, but there was something about her when she was relaxed…a quality that was missing most of the time.  As though someone had suddenly given him the ability to gaze into her soul.  Almost all of the time, he sensed that she was truly fragile in her heart, yet her outward image was hard and brittle.  Sometimes, he felt that if he reached up and touched her face, it would crack to reveal the heart hidden beneath it.  He was beginning to suspect that she wore many masks in an effort to hide her pain from others.  What was breaking her heart?

“Ah, the rain always makes me sleepy.”  She spoke suddenly, shattering the silence surrounding them.  Then, she yawned as though providing proof of her statement.

All was silent for a while as they just listened to the rain.  It was almost like Eunji was in a trance.  She stared out that window and watched the heavens unleash their grief on the earth.  She felt melancholy and not a little drowsy.  Even her limbs were beginning to feel languid.

She had a sudden impulse to rest her head on Namjoon’s shoulder.  She gave in to that impulse, leaning her head into him as they continued to listen to the pouring rain.  Before she realized it, she had fallen asleep on his shoulder.  But Namjoon had noticed.  He glanced down at her.  The sweetest expression softening his countenance.