Namjoon had come to the end of the second letter. He looked up at her. She was still gazing out at the water gently streaming by them. His heart was so moved that he had no words. He couldn’t even think of an appropriate rap right now. How could a girl who had just met him trust him this much? It scared him. It made him wonder how many girls around the world he’d had a similar effect upon. How many of them were setting all their hopes and dreams upon him? He couldn’t possibly meet them all. He had, in fact, only one heart to give away. Only one girl could ever have it. And he knew this girl was hoping it was her.
How was it fair that so many had given their hearts to him, but he could only make one of them happy? He sent up a silent prayer to the God he wasn’t sure was listening. He asked that all those girls each find a man worthy of her. Then he added a postscript. Teach them to love themselves. Then they’ll truly have something to give away to others.
Her words were haunting him.
“When I saw you, I recognized myself. Only. The me I saw in you, I loved. Why can’t I love the me I see in me? You’re so much more lovable.”
It was a lie. He wasn’t any more lovable than this precious girl seated next to him. He wanted her to love herself.
“Breeze,” he whispered. “You are so lovable. Why can’t you see it?”
She didn’t turn to look at him, and he felt adrift without her eyes meeting his own. Then she sniffed, and he realized she was crying.
“I just can’t. I’m not. If you really knew me, you wouldn’t love me. To know me is not to love me.”
Namjoon’s heart broke clean in half.
“That’s not true! I do know you. I know the you contained in your first two letters. This is a lovable girl!” He practically hollered it in his passion as he held the book up and shook it around. “You are extremely lovable.”
He knew she was sweet and kind, though as he looked back at his experience of her, he wasn’t sure he could produce any evidence to convince her of what his heart knew was true. She’d just say that he didn’t know her. So he decided to give her a chance to prove herself. To him. And to herself.
“Come stay with me.”
Her head swiveled around to face him with lightning speed as shock tore through her face.
“What?”
“I’m staying with my family. Come stay with me for the next few days.”
Would that she could! She had to be back in class on Monday morning. She had fewer than thirty-eight hours left here in Ilsan.
“I’m only here for the weekend.”
He lifted his head. “All right. Then give me the next forty-eight hours.”
She raised her eyebrows. Was he serious?
“You don’t even know me! And you want me to sleep under the same roof as your family?”
He considered her. His chocolate brown eyes probed her crystal blue ones. He saw only sweetness staring back at him.
“You wrote me an entire book. Me. A man you didn’t even know. You poured your heart, your soul, your feelings, your fears, your hopes, your dreams into this book. And then you gave it to me. So…you’re either the real deal, or you’re insane.” His lips quirked upward, showcasing those two dimples again. “And I’ve spent enough time with you,” he glanced back down at her book, “and your words,” then met her eyes again as he continued, “this morning to safely determine you’re not nuts.” He smiled, releasing the rays of the sun from his mouth once again. “Stay with me.”
Why were those beautiful words singing through every single one of her bones? And why was she hesitating? Wasn’t this what she’d dreamed of? What could there be to fear?
